Keyword: Laziness

When I was a child, what I wanted to be when I grew up was an invalid.

(1908 – 1999) English writer

Yeah, I'm kind of lazy… I'm dating a pregnant woman.


People who throw kisses are hopelessly lazy.

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor

You’ll never be as lazy as whoever named the fireplace.

Like a bump on a log

He's too lazy to scratch his own ass.

Wouldn’t say soo-ee if the pigs were eating him

Efficiency is intelligent laziness.

New Zealand writer

He’s so lazy, he’d marry a pregnant woman.

He’s so lazy he wouldn’t work in a pie factory.

If you have a difficult task, give it to a lazy person – they will find an easier way to do it.

Laziness is nothing more than the habit of resting before you get tired.

(1864 – 1910) French author

You are so lazy if you had a third hand, you’d need a third pocket to put it in.

If these walls could talk they’d be like ‘damn bitch, you’re back in bed again!?

(1978 – ) American stand-up comedian, actress & writer

That boy wouldn’t work in a pie factory, afraid he’d get full and have to quit.

I should have suspected my husband was lazy; on our wedding day, his mother told me: "I'm not losing a son; I'm gaining a couch."

(1917 – 2012) comedian & actress

Don't stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed.

(1896 – 1996) comedian, actor & entertainer

He wouldn’t holler sooey if the hogs was eatin’ em.

You’ll never be as lazy as whoever named the fireplace.

He’s got molasses in his britches.

You ever look for the remote control and can’t find it, so you just decide, ‘Ah, it looks like I’m not watching TV.”

(1966 – ) American stand-up comedian & actor

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