Keyword: Laziness

You’ll never be as lazy as whoever named the fireplace.

If these walls could talk they’d be like ‘damn bitch, you’re back in bed again!?

(1978 – ) American stand-up comedian, actress & writer

Don't stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed.

(1896 – 1996) comedian, actor & entertainer

Laziness: The habit of resting before you get tired.

If you have a difficult task, give it to a lazy person – they will find an easier way to do it.

Most people are so lazy, they don't even exercise good judgement!

fictional mascot and cover boy of Mad, an American humor magazine

Laziness is nothing more than the habit of resting before you get tired.

(1864 – 1910) French author

Efficiency is intelligent laziness.

New Zealand writer

The laziest man I ever met put popcorn in his pancakes so they would turn over by themselves.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer

He wouldn’t holler sooey if the hogs was eatin’ em.

You ever get a new cell phone and you're too lazy to transfer all the numbers over, so you just stop being friends with a bunch of people?

stand-up comedian, writer & actor

People who throw kisses are hopelessly lazy.

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor

You ever look for the remote control and can’t find it, so you just decide, ‘Ah, it looks like I’m not watching TV.”

(1966 – ) American stand-up comedian & actor

He’s so lazy, he’d marry a pregnant woman.

He’s got molasses in his britches.

Like a bump on a log

He's too lazy to scratch his own ass.

Laziness is the mother of nine inventions out of ten.

Yeah, I'm kind of lazy… I'm dating a pregnant woman.


Wouldn’t say soo-ee if the pigs were eating him

When I was a child, what I wanted to be when I grew up was an invalid.

(1908 – 1999) English writer