Keyword: Valentine’s Day

Valentine’s Day is a time to celebrate the joy of being in love… unless you’re single & lonely then it’s called Laundry Day.

(1972 – ) stand-up comedian & actor
Emotions Love

I wanted to make it really special on Valentine's Day, so I tied my boyfriend up… and for three solid hours I watched whatever I wanted on TV.

American comedian
Entertainment Television

Valentine's Day is being marketed as a Date Movie. I think it's more of a First-Date Movie. If your date likes it, do not date that person again. And if you like it, there may not be a second date.

(1942 – 2013) American film critic, journalist & screenwriter
Reviews/Criticism

I gave my girlfriend something she didn’t expect for Valentine’s Day… chlamydia.

(1972 – ) Scottish comedian
Health

To my darling wife – roses are red, violets are blue, Valentines Day is consumerist rubbish, don’t you have some ironing to do?

(1988 – ) English comedian, television presenter & actor
Marriage Wives