Subject: Church Bulletins

Church Bulletins:

Unintentionally humorous announcements, passages, blurbs or headlines that have appeared in various church bulletins or printed publications.

… she is very upset, as her mother has breasts.

Church Bulletins

Sunday we’ll have a special day to honor our youngsters for their schoolarship.

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Church Bulletins

The visiting monster today is Rev. Jack Bains.

Church Bulletins

The peacemaking meeting scheduled for today has been canceled due to a conflict.

Church Bulletins

Ushers will eat latecomers.

Church Bulletins

Join us next week for the dedication of our new expanded facility. The new sanctuary has seating for 1,000 compared to 999 for our old building.

Church Bulletins

Twenty-two members were present at the church meeting held at the home of Mrs. Marsha Crutchfield last evening. Mrs. Crutchfield and Mrs. Rankin sang a duet, The Lord Knows Why.

Church Bulletins

Don’t give up – Moses was once a basket case.

Church Bulletins

Let us join David and Lisa in the celebration of their wedding and bring their happiness to a conclusion.

Church Bulletins

God Is Good! Dr. Hargreaves is better!

Church Bulletins

The sermon this morning: Women In the Church. The closing song: Rise Up, O Men of God

Church Bulletins

Sermon Outline: I. Delineate your fear II. Disown your fear III. Displace your rear

Church Bulletins

Mrs. Johnson will be entering the hospital this week for testes.

Church Bulletins

The choir invites any member of the congregation who enjoys sinning to join the choir.

Church Bulletins

Members of the Senior’s Breakfast Club stretched and strained Thursday morning as John Doe, local physical therapist, demonstrated several exercises during the club meeting. There will be no meeting next week.

Church Bulletins

Hymn: I Need Three Every Hour

Church Bulletins

The church office will be closed until opening. It will remain closed after opening. It will reopen Monday.

Church Bulletins

Barbara remains in the hospital and needs blood donors for more transfusions. She is also having trouble sleeping and requests tapes of Pastor Jack’s sermons.

Church Bulletins

Congratulations to Tim and Ronda on the birth of their daughter October 12 thru 17.

Church Bulletins

Father is on vacation. Massages can be given to church secretary.

Church Bulletins

Bless the Lord, O my soul, and forget all His benefits.

Church Bulletins