Subject: Confucius say

Confucius say:

Jokes using puns and often risqué double-meanings 'fictitiously attributed' to Confucius, a famous Chinese philosopher (around 500 BC.) His name is used only to lend credence to the sayings of a “wise man.”

Confucius say… sex on beach is like American beer… very near water.

Confucius say

Confucius say… he who sleep on bed of nails, is indeed a holy man.

Confucius say

Confucius say… woman who wear jockstrap have make-believe ballroom.

Confucius say

Confucius say… killing two birds with one stone often ends with hate mail from the humane society.

Confucius say

Confucius say… difference between roast beef and pea soup is that anyone can roast beef.

Confucius say

Confucius say… man who eat sweets take up two seats.

Confucius say

Confucius say… he who stick head in oven get baked bean.

Confucius say

Confucius say… woman who goes to man's apartment for snack, may get tit bit.

Confucius say

Confucius say… Diet: food that make other people lose weight.

Confucius say

Confucius say… girl laid in tomb may soon become mummy.

Confucius say

Confucius say… women are like convertibles, both more fun with their top down.

Confucius say

Confucius say… it is not what you wear, it is how you take it off.

Confucius say

Confucius say… bird in hand makes it hard to blow nose.

Confucius say

Confucius say… man who eat many prunes, sit on toilet many moons.

Confucius say

Confucius say… man with forked tongue not need chop sticks.

Confucius say

Confucius say… at the feast of ego, everyone leaves hungry.

Confucius say

Confucius say… self-centered trumpet player, likes to toot his own horn.

Confucius say

Confucius say… never tell a secret to a pig… it may squeal.

Confucius say

Confucius say… balloon factory will go out of business if it can't keep up with inflation.

Confucius say

Confucius say… lovers in triangle not on square.

Confucius say

Confucius say… man who drive like hell bound to get there.

Confucius say