Subject: Tom Swifties

Tom Swifties:

A Tom Swifty is a phrase in which a quoted sentence is linked by a pun to the manner in which it is attributed. The name comes from the Tom Swift series of books.

“I’ve struck oil!” said Tom crudely.

Tom Swifties

“I got in through the window after opening it with a crowbar,” said Tom enterprisingly.

Tom Swifties

“I like modern painting,” said Tom abstractly.

Tom Swifties

“Everything in Texas is bigger,” he said in measured tones; “Even the cowboys,” he continued hoarsely.

Tom Swifties

“This boat leaks,” said Tom balefully.

Tom Swifties

“Emily has put on weight,” said Tom emphatically.

Tom Swifties

“My fellow Americans,” boomed Ronald Reagan, “I have just signed legislation to outlaw the state of Russia for ever…”

Tom Swifties

“I won’t buy a circuit breaker,” Tom refused.

Tom Swifties

“I didn’t look at all!” Tom peeped.

Tom Swifties

“I’m going window shopping,” said Tom listlessly.

Tom Swifties

“What are these berries?” Tom rasped.

Tom Swifties

“I wish I could remember the name of that card game,” said Tom wistfully.

Tom Swifties

“That city will never be rebuilt,” the prophets babble on.


Tom Swifties

“Who left the toilet seat down?” Tom asked peevishly.

Tom Swifties

“All right – we’ll use a water solution”, Tom acquiesced.

Tom Swifties

“This is the most common language used on micros,” said Tom basically.

Tom Swifties

“I feel so empty,” said Tom vacuously.

Tom Swifties

“I make the armor out of chain links,” Tom replied by mail.

Tom Swifties

“This food tastes of plutonium,” said Tom glowingly.

Tom Swifties

“Doctor, why do you have to remove my womb?” asked Mary hysterically.

Tom Swifties

“I wish I drove a Scandinavian car,” Tom sobbed.

Tom Swifties