Subject: Epitaphs

Epitaphs:

Humorous, wry or ironic inscriptions from tombs or graves (or a brief statement commemorating or epitomizing) the memory of a deceased person.

Grim death took me without any warning. I was well at night, and dead in the morning.

Epitaphs

The dame that rests beneath this tomb, had Rachel's beauty, Leah's fruitful womb, Abigail's wisdom, Lydia's faithful heart, Martha's just care, and Mary's better part.

Epitaphs

The wedding-day appointed was, and wedding clothes provided, before the nuptial day, alas! He sickened and he die did.

Epitaphs

This we must own in justice to her shade, `Tis the first bad exit Oldfield ever made.

Epitaphs

Here lies a man who all his mortal life, spent mending clocks, but could not mend his wife. The larum of his bell was ne’er so shrill as was her tongue, aye, clacking like a mill. But now he’s gone – oh whither none can tell, but hope beyond the sound of Matty’s bell.

Epitaphs

Here lies James Dunn – he raced for the crossing but the train won

Epitaphs

Here lies the body of Arkansas Jim. We made the mistake, but the joke's on him.

Epitaphs

He is not here – But only his pod; He shelled out his peas – And went to his God.

Epitaphs

Here lies the bones of Eichard Lawton – Whose death alas I was strangely brought on. – Trying his corns one day to mow off. – His razor slipped and cut his toe off. – His toe or rather what it grew to, – An inflimation quickly flew to. – Which took alas to mortifying – And was the cause of Eichards dying.

Epitaphs

He took his beer from year to year – And then the bier took him.

Epitaphs

HA! HA! I’m Pushing Up Daisies!!!

Epitaphs

I came I know not whence, I go I know not whither.

Epitaphs

Here lies Donald and his wife Janett McPhee, aged 40 he and 30 she.

Epitaphs

Excuse my dust.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Epitaphs Self

Here lies Martin Elmrod. Have mercy on my soul, good God, as I would do were I Lord God, and you were Martin Elmrod.

Epitaphs

Here lies one Wood enclosed in wood. One Wood within another. The outer wood Is very good: we cannot praise the other.

Epitaphs

Jack Lemmon In…

Epitaphs

Beneath these green trees rising to the skies, the planter of them, Isaac Greentree lies! A time shall come when these green trees shall fall, and Isaac Greentree rise above them all.

Epitaphs

Here I lie, my name is Ball, I lived, I died, despised by all; and now I cannot chew my crust, I'm gone back to my ancient dust.

Epitaphs

Here I lie, taken from life.

Epitaphs

Here lies the body of Jonathan Ground, who was lost at sea and never found.

Epitaphs