Subject: Epitaphs (Page 5)

She always said her feet were killing her – but nobody believed her.

Epitaphs

Sacred To the Memory of LEWIS WICKS, who was killed on Thursday the 4, Oct. at 2 O'ck. P.M. by a waggon loaded with hay running over his brest. AD.1821 AE 56 years 3 mo. & 4 d's. who has left an affectionate Consort, and numerous friends to lament his loss.

Epitaphs

Here lies the body of William Beck – He was thrown at a hunt and broke his neck.

Epitaphs

Poor John Scott is buried here, tho' once he was both hale and stout. Death stretched him on his bitter bier, in another world he hops about.

Epitaphs

The dust of Melantha Gribbling Swept up at last by the Great Housekeeper

Epitaphs

I'll thank you not to put your butt on my grave.

Epitaphs

Upon the fifth day of November, Christ's College lost a privy member; Cupid and death did both their arrows nick, Cupid shot short, but death did hit the prick; Women lament and maidens make great moans, Because the prick is laid beneath the stones.

Epitaphs

"I knew this was going to happen to me."

Epitaphs

Returned – Unopened

Epitaphs

Here lies the body of Thomas Kemp, Who lived by wool and died by hemp

Epitaphs

Death is a debt that’s justly due, that I have paid and so must you.

Epitaphs

School is out. Teacher Has gone home

Epitaphs

Hell no! I came here to die not to make a speech!

Epitaphs

Open, open wide ye golden gates that lead to the heavenly shore. Our father suffered in passing through and mother weighs much more.

Epitaphs

I told you so. You damned fools.

(1866 – 1946) English author
Epitaphs

I bowl'd, I struck, I caught, I stopp'd. Sure life's a game of cricket; I block'd with care, with caution popp'd, yet Death has hit my wicket.

Epitaphs

Here lies a man who while he lived was happy as a linnet. He always lied while on the earth and now he's lying in it.

Epitaphs

John Le Mesurier wishes it to be know that he conked out on November 15th. He sadly misses family and friends.

(1912 – 1983) English actor
Epitaphs

To the Memory of Abraham Beaulieu. Born 15 September 1822. Accidentally shot 4th April 1844. As a mark of affection from his brother

Epitaphs

Against his will, here lies George Hill, who from a cliff – fell down quite stiff. When it happened is not known, therefore not mentioned on this stone.

Epitaphs

Here lies the body of poor Aunt Charlotte. Born a virgin, died a harlot. For 16 years she kept her virginity, a damn'd long time for this vicinity.

Epitaphs