Subject: Misspokements

Misspokements:

Amusing, unintended verbal gaffes, grammatical errors or misuse of words, phrases, pronunciation or vocabulary – often uttered by sports personalities – most notably ‘Yogi’ Berra.

I told him he’d have a heart attack a year ago, but unfortunately he lived a year longer.

(1899 – 1985) Hungarian-born conductor & violinist
Health Misspokements

It is kisstomary to cuss the bride.

(1844 – 1930) English dean at Oxford whose name is given to the accidental transposition of sounds of two or more words
Misspokements

The Spanish manager is pulling his captain off!

(1926 – ) English sports commentator
Activities Colemanballs Misspokements Sports

Tom.

basketball coach
Misspokements Sports

Go back to what our founders and our founding documents meant – they’re quite clear –- that we would create law based on the God of the Bible and the Ten Commandments.

(1964 – ) U.S. governor (Alaska) commentator & author
Beliefs God Government Misspokements Stupidity

They’ve picked their heads up off the ground and they now have a lot to carry on their shoulders.

English former football player & manager
Misspokements Sports

We expect them (Salvadoran officials) to work toward the elimination of human rights.

(1947 – ) U.S. vice president & politician
Misspokements People

Juarez is reported to be the most dangerous city in America.

(1950 – ) American politician & 47th governor of Texas
Misspokements Places

He’s got his hands on his knees and holds his head in despair.

(1926 – ) English sports commentator
Colemanballs Misspokements

The United States has so much to offer the third world war.

(1911 – 2004) 40th U.S. president & actor
Misspokements

A well-boiled icicle

(1844 – 1930) English dean at Oxford whose name is given to the accidental transposition of sounds of two or more words
Misspokements

They said it would last two rounds; they were half right, it lasted four.

British sports commentator
Boxing Misspokements Sports

As I remember it, the bases were loaded.

professional baseball player
Baseball Misspokements Sports

If I could drop dead right now, I’d be the happiest man alive.

(1879 – 1974) film producer
Death Happiness Misspokements Speech

Chappell just stood on his feet and smashed it to the boundary.

cricket commentator
Misspokements Sports

Raise the urinals.

professional baseball player & announcer
Misspokements Sports

The doctors X-rayed my head and found nothing.

professional baseball player
Misspokements Sports

To all you hunters who kill animals for food, shame on you; you ought to go to the store and buy the meat that was made there, where no animals were harmed.

Classifieds Misspokements Stupidity

Armstrong is about to join a list which includes only himself.

sports commentator
Misspokements Sports

There is a number missing; I can see it.

(1899 – 1985) Hungarian-born conductor & violinist
Misspokements

There are two great rules of life: 1. Never tell everything at once.

(1931 – ) American golfer & broadcaster
Communication Life Misspokements Speech