Author: Epitaph Page 12

We all have a debt – To nature due – I've paid mine – And so must you.

Epitaphs

He who dies with the most toys wins

Epitaphs

My father and mother were both insane – I inherited the terrible stain. – My grandfather, grandmother, aunts and uncles – Were lunatics all, and yet died of carbuncles.

Epitaphs

Here lies the body of Martha Dias, Who was always uneasy and not over pious, She liv'd to the age of threescore and ten, And gave that to the worms she refus'd to the men.

Epitaphs

Here lies Clyde – Whose life was full – Until he tried – To milk a bull.

Epitaphs

Ma Dyed [sic]

Epitaphs

Good friend, for Jesus' sake forbear. To dig the dust enclosed here; blessed be the man that spares these stones, and curst be he that moves my bones.

Epitaphs

The children of Israel wanted bread and the Lord sent them manna. Old clerk Wallace wanted a wife, and the Devil sent him Anna.

Epitaphs

 Here lies the body of Dr Hayward, a man who never voted. Of such is the kingdom of Heaven.

Epitaphs

Here lies the body of Martha Dias, who was always uneasy, and not over pious; she lived to the age of three score and ten, and gave that to the worms she refused to the men.

Epitaphs

Here lies James Dunn – he raced for the crossing but the train won

Epitaphs

I came I know not whence, I go I know not whither.

Epitaphs

Here rests an old woman who always was tired, for she lived in a house where no help was hired; Her very last words were, “My friends I am goin*, to a land where there's nothin' of washin' or sewin', and everything there shall be just to ray wishes, for where they don't eat there's no washin' of dishes; the land with sweet anthems is constantly ringin', but having no voice I'll get clear of the singin'." She folded her hands, her latest endeavor, and whispered, "Oh nothin', sweet nothin forever."

Epitaphs

Beneath this smooth stone by the bone of his bone – Sleeps Master John Gill; – By lies when alive this attorney did thrive, – And now that he's dead he lies still.

Epitaphs Lawyers Lies

Jeffrey Bottom – His wife was constantly scolding and scoffing , so he sought for repose in a 12 coin coffin

Epitaphs

Scotty… beam me up!

Epitaphs

Here lays Butch. We planted him raw. He was quick on the trigger – But slow on the draw.

Epitaphs

Shall all we die? We shall die all. All die shall we? Die all we shall.

Epitaphs

Beneath this stone now dead to grief Lies Grid the famous Wokag chief. Pause here and think you learned prig, This man was once an Indian big. Consider this, ye lowly one, this man was once a big in-jun. Now he lies here, you too must rot, as sure as pig shall go to pot.

Epitaphs

The dame that rests beneath this tomb, had Rachel's beauty, Leah's fruitful womb, Abigail's wisdom, Lydia's faithful heart, Martha's just care, and Mary's better part.

Epitaphs

Here lies the body of Samuel Crane – He ran a race with a passenger train. He got to the crossing and almost across. Sam and his car was a total loss. Sams spirit now tolls his knell. That Sam is on his way to well – If he only took time to stop look and listen, He'd be living now instead of missing

Epitaphs