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Author: Roger Ebert Page 3
This movie doesn't scrape the bottom of the barrel. This movie isn't the bottom of the barrel. This movie isn't below the bottom of the barrel. This movie doesn't deserve to be mentioned in the same sentence with barrels.
Roger Ebert
(1942 – 2013) American film critic, journalist & screenwriter
Reviews/Criticism
“Freddy Got Fingered”
The director, whose name is Pitof, was probably issued with two names at birth and would be wise to use the other one on his next project.
Roger Ebert
(1942 – 2013) American film critic, journalist & screenwriter
Reviews/Criticism
“Catwoman”
Going to see
Godzilla
at the Palais of the Cannes Film Festival is like attending a satanic ritual in St. Peter's Basilica… it was the festival's closing film, coming at the end like the horses in a parade, perhaps for the same reason.
Roger Ebert
(1942 – 2013) American film critic, journalist & screenwriter
Reviews/Criticism
“Godzilla”
To call it an anticlimax would be an insult not only to climaxes but to prefixes.
Roger Ebert
(1942 – 2013) American film critic, journalist & screenwriter
Reviews/Criticism
“The Village”
You know you’re in trouble when you’re reduced to praising a movie for its absence of fart jokes, and have to add ‘almost.’
Roger Ebert
(1942 – 2013) American film critic, journalist & screenwriter
Reviews/Criticism
“Saving Silverman”
The movie Ed Wood, about the worst director of all time, was made to prepare us for
Stargate.
– Review of “Stargate”
Roger Ebert
(1942 – 2013) American film critic, journalist & screenwriter
Reviews/Criticism
“Ed Wood”
“Stargate”
Parents: If you encounter teenagers who say they liked this movie, do not let them date your children.
Roger Ebert
(1942 – 2013) American film critic, journalist & screenwriter
Reviews/Criticism
“Resident Evil: Apocalypse”
Add it all up, and what you’ve got here is a waste of good electricity. I’m not talking about the electricity between the actors. I’m talking about the current to the projector.
Roger Ebert
(1942 – 2013) American film critic, journalist & screenwriter
Reviews/Criticism
Review of “One Woman or Two”
>Battlefield Earth is like taking a bus trip with someone who has needed a bath for a long time. It's not merely bad; it's unpleasant in a hostile way.
Roger Ebert
(1942 – 2013) American film critic, journalist & screenwriter
Reviews/Criticism
“Battlefield Earth”
You used to be able to depend on a bad film being poorly made. No longer.
The Punisher: War Zone
[sic] is one of the best-made bad movies I’ve seen… Its only flaw is that it’s disgusting.
Roger Ebert
(1942 – 2013) American film critic, journalist & screenwriter
Reviews/Criticism
Review of “Punisher: War Zone”
This movie is not merely bad, but incompetent. I get tapes in the mail from 10th graders that are better made than this… I have often asked myself, “What would it look like if the characters in a movie were animatronic puppets created by aliens with an imperfect mastery of human behavior?” Now I know.
Roger Ebert
(1942 – 2013) American film critic, journalist & screenwriter
Reviews/Criticism
Of “Friends & Lovers”
John Waters’
Pink Flamingos
has been restored for its 25th anniversary revival, and with any luck at all that means I won’t have to see it again for another 25 years. If I haven’t retired by then, I will.
Roger Ebert
(1942 – 2013) American film critic, journalist & screenwriter
Reviews/Criticism
“Pink Flamingos”
Spice World
is obviously intended as a ripoff of
A Hard Day's Night
which gave The Beatles to the movies… the huge difference, of course, is that the Beatles were talented — while, let's face it, the Spice Girls could be duplicated by any five women under the age of 30 standing in line at Dunkin' Donuts.
Roger Ebert
(1942 – 2013) American film critic, journalist & screenwriter
Reviews/Criticism
“Spice World”
To call
A Lot Like Love
dead in the water is an insult to water.
Roger Ebert
(1942 – 2013) American film critic, journalist & screenwriter
Reviews/Criticism
“A Lot Like Love”
Mad Dog Time
is the first movie I have seen that does not improve on the sight of a blank screen viewed for the same length of time.
Roger Ebert
(1942 – 2013) American film critic, journalist & screenwriter
Reviews/Criticism
“Mad Dog Time”
I've been reviewing movies for a long time, and I can't think of one that more dramatically shoots itself in the foot.
Roger Ebert
(1942 – 2013) American film critic, journalist & screenwriter
Reviews/Criticism
“Diary of a Mad Black Woman”
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