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Keyword: As Carl Spackler in “Caddyshack”

Sandy: I want you to kill every gopher on the course!

Carl: Check me if I’m wrong Sandy, but if I kill all the golfers, they’re gonna lock me up and throw away the key.

Bill Murray
(1950 – ) American actor & comedian
Golf Sports TV/Movie Quotes As Carl Spackler in “Caddyshack” Gophers

I have to laugh, because I’ve outsmarted even myself. … In order to conquer the animal, I have to learn to think like an animal… and, whenever possible, to look like one. I’ve gotta get inside this guy’s pelt and crawl around for a few days.

Bill Murray
(1950 – ) American actor & comedian
Animals TV/Movie Quotes As Carl Spackler in “Caddyshack” Gophers

[preparing to dynamite the gopher tunnel] In the immortal words of Jean Paul Sartre, ‘Au revoir, gopher.’

Bill Murray
(1950 – ) American actor & comedian
TV/Movie Quotes As Carl Spackler in “Caddyshack”

So we finish 18 and he’s gonna stiff me. And I say, ‘Hey, Lama, hey, how about a little something, you know, for the effort, you know.’ And he says, ‘Oh, uh, there won’t be any money, but when you die, on your deathbed, you will receive total consciousness.’ … So I got that goin’ for me, which is nice.

Bill Murray
(1950 – ) American actor & comedian
TV/Movie Quotes As Carl Spackler in “Caddyshack” Dalai Lama Tipping













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