Subject: Confucius say (Page 13)

Confucius say… diet is a selection of food that makes other people lose weight.

Confucius say

Confucius say… it's not what you wear, it's how you take it off.

Confucius say

Confucius say… balloon factory will go out of business if it can't keep up with inflation.

Confucius say

Confucius say… man who wear short sleeved shirt supports right to bare arms.

Confucius say

Confucius say… virginity like balloon… one prick – all gone.

Confucius say

Confucius say… he who eats crackers in bed, get crummy sleep.

Confucius say

Confucius say… hearty laughter is a good way to jog internally without having to go outdoors.

Confucius say

Confucius say… newscaster who reports hurricanes, knows how to talk up a storm.

Confucius say

Confucius say… misfortune is the kind of fortune that never misses.

Confucius say

Confucius say… Einstein stared at his cousin's boobs, he discovered 'Theory of Relative Titty'.

Confucius say

Confucius say… is only when a mosquito lands on your testicles that you realize there is always a way to solve a problem without violence.

Confucius say

Confucius say… if you turn Oriental around, he become disoriented.

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Confucius say… bird in hand makes it hard to blow nose.

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Confucius say… he who thinks by the inch and talks by the yard deserves to be kicked by the foot.

Confucius say

Confucius say… never have sex with a stranger unless you are stranger than them.

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Confucius say… wife not part of furniture until screwed on bed.

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Confucius say… keep your words soft and sweet, just in case you have to eat them.

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Confucius say… diplomat is a man who can convince his wife that a fur coat will make her look fat.

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Confucius say… only thing shorter than a weekend is a vacation.

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Confucius say… man who walk through airport turnstile sideways going to Bangkok.

Confucius say

Confucius say… if the shoe fits, get another one just like it.

Confucius say