Subject: Reviews/Criticism (Page 15)

Your expectations of how bad The Lone Ranger is can’t trump the reality.

American film critic & televison interviewer
Reviews/Criticism

[“The Sun Also Rises” is about] bullfighting, bullslinging and bullshitting.

(1900 – 1948) novelist (wife of writer F. Scott Fitzgerald)
Reviews/Criticism

At first, I thought the sword sequences were in slow-motion, but then I realized these guys just suck.

(movie reviews at mrcranky.com)
Reviews/Criticism

I smile so seldom that I wonder at Arlene Francis, who smiles persistently… like the Sorcerer's Apprentice, once she turns it on can she turn it off?

(1906 – 1972) pianist, composer, author, comedian & actor
People Reviews/Criticism

… it’s about as entertaining as being pulled over by U.S. customs.

(1954 – ) British writer & critic
Reviews/Criticism

[Lindsay] Lohan reads more like oak than Marilyn Monroe on her most inebriated day.

film critic
Reviews/Criticism

Listen, dear, you couldn’t write f**k in the dust on a Venetian blind.

(1913 – 1991) Australian actress
Reviews/Criticism

The incompetent who directed this film is Mike Mitchell, who’s probably some buddy of (Rob) Schneider and Adam Sandler, and whose main talent up until this point was cleaning potato chip crumbs off Sandler’s couch.

(movie reviews at mrcranky.com)
Reviews/Criticism

It’s a thing, not a movie –- if, that is, you believe a movie should be more than an accumulation of prankish set-pieces flimsily strung over 80 skimpy minutes.

film critic
Reviews/Criticism

The movie Ed Wood, about the worst director of all time, was made to prepare us for Stargate. – Review of “Stargate”

(1942 – 2013) American film critic, journalist & screenwriter
Reviews/Criticism

Modern art is what happens when painters stop looking at girls and persuade themselves that they have a better idea.

(1916 – 1986) American poet, translator & etymologist
Reviews/Criticism

The covers of this book are too far apart.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Books Reviews/Criticism

Beethoven always sounds to me like the upsetting of a bag of nails, with here and there also a dropped hammer.

(1819 – 1900) English art critic, social thinker, poet & artist
Entertainment Music Reviews/Criticism

Here’s the big mystery of Pittsburgh: How did this movie manage to be so completely terrible?

film critic
Reviews/Criticism

Thank you for sending me a copy of your book; I’ll waste no time reading it.

(1900 – 1986) American teacher & translator
Books Reviews/Criticism

I even watched Mulholland Drive in French… it didn't make much more sense in French, but I have to say, it didn't make any less sense either.

Irish radio broadcaster
Reviews/Criticism

To imagine that there was a whole process required to bring this film to screen is almost too painful to imagine.

(movie reviews at mrcranky.com)
Reviews/Criticism

Not only could we see that coming a mile away, we could see it wouldn't be funny from a mile away.

(1959 – ) American columnist & film critic
Reviews/Criticism

After Earth merits comparison with 2000’s Battlefield Earth, John Travolta’s godawful film tribute to the sci-fi novel by Scientology founder L. Ron Hubbard. Yes, it’s that bad.

American film critic & televison interviewer
Reviews/Criticism

My favorite review described me as the cinematic equivalent of junk mail.

(1957 – ) American actor, director, writer & fireman
Reviews/Criticism

All through the five acts of that Shakespearean tragedy he played the King as though under momentary apprehension that someone else was about to play the Ace.

(1850 – 1895) American writer
Acting Reviews/Criticism