Subject: Sports (Page 17)

Because she is too damn ugly to kiss goodbye.

(1923 – 2013) American professional football coach
Sports

Even a sixty-year-old man with no arms thinks he could play in the Super Bowl if he had to.

(1953 – ) comedian, dancer & writer
Age Characteristics Men People Sports

If a horse won’t eat it, I don’t want to play on it.

(1942 – ) American baseball player
Baseball Sports

Everybody wants a piece of the cake, but my cake has no slices.

Swedish boxing champion
Boxing Sports

We worked 80 hour weeks for 30 years to keep from having to get a real job.

American drag racing crew chief & pioneer
Auto racing Sports

I can tell you it’s a magnificent sensation when the gap opens up like that and you just burst right through.

New Zealand rugby player & commentator
Misspokements Sports

Success is not the result of spontaneous combustion; you must first set yourself on fire.

(1925 – 1990) Canadian hockey player, coach & general manager
Hockey Sports Success

I don’t know what he has… a pulled groin… a hip flexor… I dont know… a pulled something;  I never pulled anything… you can’t pull fat.

American football coach
Football Sports

Statistics are to baseball what a flaky crust is to Mom’s apple pie.

(1926 – 1991) American television journalist
Baseball Science/Weather Sports

Interviewer: Have you ever thought of writing your autobiography?

Chris Eubank: On what?

British boxing champion
Boxing Misspokements Sports

That’s the first time he had started from the front row in a Grand Prix, having done so in Canada earlier this year.

(1923 – ) English motorsport commentator
Auto racing Misspokements Sports

They will pass the father-son tandem of Buddy Bell and Yogi Berra.

(1922 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer
Baseball Misspokements

Why would anyone expect him to come out smarter? … he went to prison for three years, not Princeton.

(1922 – ) boxing trainer & manager
Boxing Intelligence Sports

If Mike Tyson gets any better, he’ll be hitting Lou Rawls while he sings the National Anthem.

American television personality
Boxing Sports

It’s weird… people say they’re not like apes; now how do you explain football then?

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian
Animals Football Sports

Give me a man with big hands and big feet and no brains and I'll make a golfer out of him.

American professional golfer
Golf Sports

That boy couldn't hit the ground if he fell out of an airplane.

(1890 – 1975) American baseball manager
Baseball Sports

You should always throw a club ahead of you so that you don’t have to walk any extra distance to get it.

(1916 – 2008) American professional golfer
Golf Sports

You can't even jump high enough to touch the rim, unless they put a Big Mac on it.

(1963 – ) American professional basketball player & sports personality
Basketball Sports

If everything seems under control, you’re not going fast enough.

(1940 – ) Italian-American auto racer
Autos Situations Sports

Baseball is drama with an endless run and an ever-changing cast.

(1926 – 2016) American baseball player, announcer & television host
Baseball Sports