Subject: Sports (Page 17)

I'm just what America needs – another unemployed black man.

(1963 – ) American professional basketball player & sports personality
Basketball Sports

I guess I’d better send my fingers to Cooperstown.

baseball player
Baseball Sports

He shortened my career having to chase him around the ice all the time.

Canadian ice hockey player & coach
Hockey Sports

There'll be two buses leaving the hotel for the park tomorrow. The two o'clock bus will be for those of you who need a little extra work. The empty bus will leave at five o'clock.

professional baseball manager
Sports

We’re not attempting to circumcise the rules.

football coach
Football Malaprops Sports

The three important elements of hockey are: forecheck, backcheck and paycheck.

Canadian hockey player
Hockey Sports

The Rangers dropped out of the lead June 16 with a loss that will be forever remembered as the forgettable debut of lefthander Matt Perisho.

sports reporter
Baseball Misspokements Sports

Armstrong is about to join a list which includes only himself.

sports commentator
Misspokements Sports

The smaller the ball used in a sport, the better the book.

Books Communication Murphy’s Laws Reading/Writing Sports

I think they have to take this bunch down to the slaughterhouse to get weighed.

American football coach
Appearance Football Sports

Whoever came up with ice fishing must have had the worst marriage on the planet.

(1953 – ) American comedian & writer
Marriage Sports

The earth in LA moved more in one hour than Benoit Benjamin did all last season with the Clippers.

American sports columnist & analyst
Basketball Sports

All of the Mets' road wins against Los Angeles this year have been at Dodger Stadium.

(1922 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer
Baseball Misspokements Sports

Sugar Ray Leonard was asked by Johnny Carson, “When do the wounds from the fight heal?”
His reply: “When the check clears.”

American boxing champion
Boxing Sports

Football is a sport that bears the same relation to education that bullfighting does to agriculture.

(1856 – 1915) writer, publisher, artist & philosopher
Education Football Sports

The announcement of the disqualification was greeted by booze from the spectators at the pool.

Alcohol Food/Drink Sports

I imagine the conditions in those cars today are totally unimaginable.

(1923 – ) English motorsport commentator
Auto racing Misspokements Sports

I've heard people say putting is 50 percent technique and 50 percent mental. I really believe it is 50 percent technique and 90 percent positive thinking, see, but that adds up to 140 percent, which is why nobody is 100 percent sure how to putt.

(1935 – ) Puerto Rican professional golfer
Golf Sports

Linford Christie’s got a habit of pulling it out when it matters most.

(1926 – ) English sports commentator
Colemanballs Misspokements Sports

When you’re 21, you're a prospect; when you’re 30, you’re a suspect.

baseball player
Baseball Sports

The only difference between this and Custer's last stand was Custer didn't have to look at the tape afterwards.

Canadian hockey player & broadcaster
Hockey Sports