Author: Country expression Page 14

Shit fire and save matches

Planted corn before the fence was built

If the Lord’s willing and the creeks don’t rise.

Breast baby

It’s raining so hard the animals are starting to pair up.

They ate supper before they said grace.

I’m gonna tan yer hide!

Sweatin’ like a $2 whore in church

Not blessed with beauty…

I went to the barber and got my ears lowered.

Crookeder than a dog’s hind leg.

Prettier than a spotted heifer in a pansy patch!

He’s as tough as a boot.

Don't get your knickers in a knot.

He was so nervous, he could thread a sewing machine while it was running.

Dumber than a barrel of hair

Don’t insult the alligator till you’ve crossed the stream.

Forty eleven

It don’t take long to examine a hot horseshoe.

You’ve got the saw by the wrong tree.

He could sell ice to an Eskimo.