Subject: Problems

If a man could have half his wishes, he would double his troubles.

(1706 – 1790) American statesman, author, scientist & inventor

A child will not spill on a dirty floor.

We learn something every day, and lots of times it’s that what we learned the day before was wrong.

(1915 – 1977) columnist, writer & actor

Never do anything standing that you can do sitting, or anything sitting that you can do lying down.

When the water reaches the upper deck, follow the rats.

If anything can go wrong, it will do so in triplicate.

Life is not having been told that the man has just waxed the floor.

(1902 – 1971) American humorist & poet

Any new activity will cause more trouble than you can possibly imagine.

If only one solution can be found for a field problem, then it is usually a stupid solution.

No one is listening until you make a mistake.

I am one of those people who just can’t help getting a kick out of life – even when it’s a kick in the teeth.

(1900 – 1962) Russian – Jewish madam & author

An unexpectedly easy-to-handle sequence of events will be immediately followed by an equally long sequence of trouble.

Logic is a system whereby one may go wrong with confidence.

(1876 – 1958) inventor

Assumption is the mother of the screw-up.

Sex: The thing that takes up the least amount of time and causes the most amount of trouble.

(1882 – 1942) American actor

Some problems are so complex that you have to be highly intelligent and well informed just to be undecided about them.

(1919 – 1990) educator & writer

If money can fix it, it’s not a problem.

(1937 – 2014) American co-host of radio show “Car Talk”

The most undesirable things are the most certain (death and taxes).

If at first you don’t succeed, try try again… then quit; there’s no use being a damn fool about it.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer

The deficiency will never show itself during the dry runs.

Things go right so they can go wrong.