Subject: Money

Do you think that when they asked George Washington for ID that he just whipped out a quarter?

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Money People Situations

You can't get rich sitting on the bench, but I'm giving it a try.

professional baseball player
Baseball Money Sports

Today, I bought a pastrami sandwich: $13.75; walked back out in the street – genuine Rolex watch: six bucks.

(1957 – 2007) American stand-up comedian & actor
Money New York City Places

Misers make wonderful ancestors.

Frugal Money

Yeah, this comedy is all a part of my “Get Rich Slow” scheme… and it’s working.

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian
Entertainment Money Wealth

If you love someone, set them free. If they come back, they’re probably broke.

Emotions Love Money

The safe way to double your money is to fold it over once and put it in your pocket.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Money

Politicians who vote huge expenditures to alleviate problems get re-elected; those who propose structural changes to prevent problems get early retirement.

Government Money Murphy’s Laws Politicians

The best investment opportunities are encountered when you are broke.

Money Murphy’s Laws

The trouble with being poor is that it takes up all of your time.

(1924 – 1997) Dutch-American artist
Money Poverty Time

Advertising may be described as the science of arresting the human intelligence long enough to get money from it.

(1869 – 1944) Canadian economist & humorist
Intelligence Money

If the guy was poor, I’d give it back.

(1925 – 2015) baseball player, coach & manager
Poverty Yogi-isms

We were so poor, every Christmas Eve my old man would go outside and shoot his gun, then come in and tell us kids Santa Claus had committed suicide.

(1921 – ) American boxing champion
Money Poverty

I'm gonna ask the Falcons for so much money they'll have to put me on layaway.

American football player
Football Money Sports

Money isn’t everything: usually it isn’t enough.

Money

The Englishman who has lost his fortune is said to have died of a broken heart.

(1803 – 1882) essayist, poet, & philosopher
Emotions England Money People Places Wealth

He’s the only man I ever knew who had rubber pockets so he could steal soup.

(1876 – 1933) screenwriter
Frugal Insults Money

Markets can remain irrational a lot longer than you and I can remain solvent.

American financial analyst & commentator
Money

If you want to know what God thinks of money, you only have to look at those to whom he gives it.

(1874 – 1945) English writer, translator & war correspondent
Beliefs God Money

Because you are feeding both the child and the floor, raising this child will be expensive.

(1937 – ) comedian & television actor
Children Family Food/Drink Money

Whoever said money can’t buy happiness simply didn’t know where to go shopping.


Activities Emotions Happiness Money Shopping