Subject: Classifieds (Page 15)

We meet every Friday of the month except the first and third.

List your ten favourite albums… I just want to know if there's anything worth keeping when we finally break up. Practical, forward thinking man, 35.

WANTED: 30 Chinamen and a zeppelin for elaborate practical joke. Can you help? Please call…

Wanted to Rent – Wanted: Room to rent. Saudi Arabia students are looking for American families to live with. Call Osamah at 419-….

’91 BLAZER 4 DR. 4X4 – Loaded with miles! $7995

FAMILY SEEKING energetic, young woman. Dedicated, responsible, family oriented, as permanent live-in provider, assistant, companion, concubine. Compensation negotiable.

Wanted: Tudor [sic] needed for help in English class.

ETERNAL ASCENT – sends cremated remains to the heavens in a special balloon. Let us help make your loved one’s final journey a memorable one. We also release pets. Call 800-808-….

1 man, 7 woman hot tub – $850/offer

PET OF THE WEEK • Let this dog, Pea, in your home.

WANTED: 12 volt electric wench, must be reasonable… 24 Hour Service – Animal Control – Joe Sweeney – Removal Of Nuisance Wild Animals • Chimney Caps • Rats & Bats (203) 421-….

If you sign up today for a full year's service by February 10th…

HELP WANTED – PlayStation Brand Ambassador

Ensure your next erection is in safe hands.

Full sized mattress. 20 year warranty. Like New. Slight urine smell.

$17,962 – ’98 Lincolon Town Car

Fresh-Cut CHRISTMAS TREES Arriving December 28th – We Carry the Fullest Freshest Trees Available…

“The only difference between tattooed and untattooed people is that tattooed people are way more cool and can kick you ass.”

CHRISTIAN woman looking for Christian man partner who is sympathetic with woman who has mental illness and hears voices but is self controlled. Phone…

TURKEY – FOR SALE. Partially eaten. Only eight days old. Both drumsticks still intact. $23.00 OBO

100% OFF – Any Bike Purchase of $1000 Or More…