Subject: Miscellaneous (Page 15)

The best way to get a puppy is to beg for a baby brother… they’ll settle for a puppy every time.

Miscellaneous

I never trust a man under sheets.

(1884 – 1980) author & wit
Miscellaneous

He’s busier than a one legged man in a butt kickin’ contest.

Miscellaneous

Cross my heart and hope to eat my weight in goslings.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer
Miscellaneous

Remember, blood is not only much thicker than water, it’s much more difficult to get out of the carpet.

(1917 – 2012) comedian & actress
Miscellaneous

Well, cut my legs off and call me shorty.

Miscellaneous

Don't stand behind a coughing cow.

Miscellaneous Proverbs

That’s smoother than a spanked baby’s butt

Miscellaneous

"shootin" horseshoes

Miscellaneous

I have to laugh when I think of the first cigar, because it was probably just a bunch of rolled-up tobacco leaves.

Miscellaneous

Murray: Being fired is like being violated!

Sue Ann: Leave it to Murray to find a bright spot in all this.

1922) American actress, comedian & television personality
Miscellaneous

You couldn’t catch a catfish in a coffee cup.

Miscellaneous

It's hotter than Georgia asphalt.

Miscellaneous

Rough as a cob

Miscellaneous

Too mean for Jesus, too dumb for the Devil

Miscellaneous

She’s so stubborn she’d argue with a stop sign.

Miscellaneous

Proud as a dog with a hemstitched tail

Miscellaneous

Sunday-go-to-meeting clothes

Miscellaneous

Return an answer.

Miscellaneous

Rehabilitation

Miscellaneous

She’s got more than one mule in her stable.

Miscellaneous