Subject: Sports (Page 51)

We (the Mets) are a much improved ball club, now we lose in extra innings!

(1890 – 1975) American baseball manager
Baseball Sports

And he’s done that in a whisker under 10 seconds, call it 9.7 in round figures.

(1923 – ) English motorsport commentator
Auto racing Misspokements Sports

The great thing about golf – and this is the reason why a lot of health experts like me recommend it – you can drink beer and ride in a cart while you play.

(1947 – ) American columnist & humorist
Beer Food/Drink Golf Sports

One reason I never called balks is that I never understood the rule.

(1937 – 1995) American Major League Baseball umpire
Baseball Sports

The key to winning baseball games is pitching, fundamentals and three-run homers.

(1930 – 2013) American baseball manager
Baseball Sports

Bert's wallet is like an onion. Any time he opens it, he starts crying.

Canadian hockey player
Hockey Sports

It opens a spacious firmament to the bewildered eyes, wherein you discover more planets in a second than most distinguished astronomers observe in a lifetime.

Boxing writer
Boxing Sports

Andujar Cedeno to lead it off; he swings… and he is hit by a pitch… and it is hit over the wall and out of here for a home run.

(1922 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer
Baseball Misspokements Sports

I used to play sports; then I realized you can buy trophies.

(1973 – ) American comedian
Sports

If the fans don’t wanna come out to the ballpark, no one can stop ‘em

(1925 – 2015) baseball player, coach & manager
Sports Yogi-isms

Ballesteros felt much better today after a 69 yesterday.

Golf Misspokements Sports

Finishing second in the Olympics gets you silver; finishing second in politics gets you oblivion.

(1913 – 1994) 37th U.S. president
Government Politics Sports

All hockey players are bilingual; they know English and profanity.

(1928 – ) Canadian professional ice hockey player
Hockey Sports

If you see the ball, hit it… that’s what it’s there for.

(1925 – 2015) baseball player, coach & manager
Baseball Sports Yogi-isms

It ain't like football. You can't make up no trick plays.

(1925 – 2015) baseball player, coach & manager
Baseball Sports Yogi-isms

We’re going to turn this team around 360 degrees.

professional basketball player
Misspokements Sports

I’m traveling to all 51 states to see who can stop #85.

professional football player (#85)
Football Misspokements Sports

We take the shortest route to the puck and arrive in ill humor.

professional hockey player
Hockey Sports

You can say something to popes, kings and presidents, but you can't talk to officials. In the next war they ought to give everyone a whistle.

(1922 – 2002) American college basketball coach
Basketball Sports

Larry Lintz steals second standing up… he slid, but he didn’t have to.

(1924 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer
Baseball Misspokements Sports

If hockey fights were fake, I'd be in more of them.

professional hockey player
Fights Hockey Sports