Subject: Tom Swifties (Page 11)

“I wonder if there’s a number between seven and nine,” said Tom considerately.

Tom Swifties

“I pulled a hamstring,” said Tom limply.

Tom Swifties

“I’m going to get a hair transplant,” said Tom baldly.

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“It’s my personal magnetism,” said Tom ironically.

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“I prefer trout to salmon,” Tom said officiously.

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“I’ve got to stop this motor,” Tom choked.

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“Eating uranium makes me feel funny,” said Tom radiantly.

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“Do you buy and sell stolen goods?” asked Tom offensively.

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“I lost my trousers,” said Tom expansively.

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“Doctor, why do you have to remove my womb?” asked Mary hysterically.

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“Don’t add too much water,” said Tom with great concentration.

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“I’m from Missouri,” Tom stated.

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“This steamroller is amazing,” said Tom flatteringly.

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“I’m a lot taller than I was yesterday,” said Tom gruesomely.

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“This boat is leaking,” said Tom balefully.

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“You dance just like Fred Astaire,” she said gingerly.

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“Don’t you love sleeping outdoors,” Tom said intently.

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“I’ve dug myself into a hole,” Tom said gravely.

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“I can no longer hear anything,” said Tom deftly.

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“Well, I got here with five minutes to spare,” said Tom bitterly.

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“I’m burning aromatic substances,” said Tom, incensed.

Tom Swifties