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humorous one-liners, quotations, jokes, Murphy's Laws & more
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Author: Classified ad Page 5
These items may or may not be available at all times, and sometimes not at all and other times all the time.
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Classifieds
Notice on a menu in Fort Bragg California
Can’t move or speak? It may be a STROKE. No one is too young. Time lost is brain lost. CALL 911
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Classifieds
Want to Buy • City council candidate. Would like to rent or buy a bullet proof vest for 10 months. 384-….
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Classifieds
Read Weight in the Palm of Your Hand! … No More Bending Over or Looking Down!
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Classifieds
For a bathroom scale
Wednesday, September 21 – Ball-A-Palooza! 5000 golf balls will be dropped from a helicopter for a chance to win great prizes. Sponsored by the N.E.W. Curative Rehabilitation, Inc. with all proceeds going directly into the Brain Injury Program…
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Classifieds
For Adoption: 2 female Chihuahua, both crate trained. Also 1 male Old English sheep dog, w/2 glass eyes. Good guard dog. Adoption fee $50 to $100. For more information call…
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Classifieds
Looking for a small “13 inch” male registered Beagle to breed with our little girl. Call 862-….
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Classifieds
Christmas Sale. Handmade gifts for the hard-to- find person.
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“The only difference between tattooed and untattooed people is that tattooed people are way more cool and can kick you ass.”
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Classifieds
Ad for a tattoo parlor
Nice Parachute – Never opened. Used once.
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Classifieds
SPANISH TOOTER NEEDED FOR A 7 year old student, learn to speak and write fluently. Call after 6 pm. 467-….
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CLASSIFIED: An unexpected vacancy for a knife-thrower's assistant. Rehearsals start immediately.
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92’ BLK VOLKSWAGON CABRIOLET Answers to the name April. Last seen in Towson near the YMCA. Yes, Owner is Blonde. If found please call Button…
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Classifieds
How to Speak and Write Like A Colleg [sic] Graduate
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Righteous Kill
– Pacino & Deniro play veteran cops on the trail of a cereal killer…
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Classifieds
A story that appeared ion Sunday’s Argus Observer contained a incorrect spelling of a name. Pastor Dick Bigelow was incorrectly identified as Dick Bigblow. The Argus Observor regrets the error.
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Classifieds
YOUTH PROGRAMS • GENERAL/SOCIAL – Skydiving for Tots – (ages 10 mos.–2 years) Introduce your toddler to the fun and thrill of skydiving before he or she develops unwarranted fears of freefalling. Certified jump instructor…
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WANTED – Air Traffic Control. No Exp. Needed: we train, HS grads 17–34. Great pay, benefits. Must relocate. Call M-F…
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Save on Manor Hall Interior Latex – Semi-Gross – $26.90…
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WANTED: 30 Chinamen and a zeppelin for elaborate practical joke. Can you help? Please call…
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Classifieds
WANTED. Hunting rifle, suitable for teenagers.
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Classifieds
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