Author: Confucius Page 18

Confucius say… man with five dicks will have pants that fit like a glove.

Confucius say… man who put head on railroad track to listen for train likely to end up with splitting headache.

Confucius say… nail on board is not good as screw on bench.

Confucius say… man who snatches kisses when young, kisses snatches when old.

Confucius say… ratio of an igloo's circumference to its diameter is Eskimo Pi.

Confucius say… enemy is sometimes nothing more than a friend who got wise to you.

Confucius say… wise man buy prunes… get good run for money.

Confucius say… best way to keep your word is not to give it.

Confucius say… best time to buy new mattress, at first sign of spring.

Confucius say… if you think you’re going to sum up your whole life on this little bit of paper, you’re crazy.

Confucius say… never cut rope that can be simply untied.

Confucius say… best way to save face, is to keep the lower part of it shut.

Confucius say… only one whose troubles are behind him, is a school bus driver.

Confucius say… you will die alone and poorly dressed.

Confucius say… man who put cream in tart, not always baker.

Confucius say… war not determine who's right, war determines who's left.

Confucius say… wise man makes sure that his wife's birthday cake is short one candle.

Confucius say… if you run into your ex on the street, just shift into reverse and keep going.

Confucius say… worm that falls asleep in King Arthur’s apple will wake up in middle of knight.

Confucius say… balloon factory will go out of business if it can't keep up with inflation.

Confucius say… difference between roast beef and pea soup is that anyone can roast beef.