Author: Homer Simpson Page 2

I've got to get out of this rut and back in the groove.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
Life TV/Movie Quotes

That horse had better win, or else we're taking a trip to the glue factory… and he won't get to come.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
TV/Movie Quotes

Aah beer, the cause of – and solution to – all life’s problems. 

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
Beer TV/Movie Quotes

Weaseling out of things is important to learn; it's what separates us from the animals… except the weasel.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
Situations TV/Movie Quotes

We can hike anytime; this is our chance to see cars driving.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
Activities TV/Movie Quotes

He's trying to hypnotize me, and it's not in that good Las Vegas kind of way.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
TV/Movie Quotes

Stupidity got us into this mess, and stupidity will get us out.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
Situations Stupidity TV/Movie Quotes

Marriage is like a coffin and each kid is another nail.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
Children Marriage TV/Movie Quotes

You’re everywhere. You’re omnivorous.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
Malaprops TV/Movie Quotes

Kids are great. You can teach them to hate what you hate and, with the Internet and all, they practically raise themselves.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
Children TV/Movie Quotes

You don't like your job, you don't strike. You go in every day and do it really half-assed. That's the American way.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
TV/Movie Quotes Work

American donuts… glazed, powdered and raspberry-filled; now how's that for freedom of choice?

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
TV/Movie Quotes

We can outsmart those dolphins. Don't forget – we invented computers, leg warmers, bendy straws, peel-and-eat shrimp, the glory hole, and the pudding cup.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
Intelligence TV/Movie Quotes

You know, my kids think you're the greatest. And thanks to your gloomy music, they've finally stopped dreaming of a future I can't possibly provide.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
TV/Movie Quotes

My favorite kind of wild animal is on a plate.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
Animals TV/Movie Quotes

I want to share something with you: The three little sentences that will get you through life. Number 1: Cover for me. Number 2: Oh, good idea, Boss! Number 3: It was like that when I got here.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
TV/Movie Quotes

Remember as far as anyone knows, we're a nice normal family.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
Family TV/Movie Quotes

It takes two to lie, Marge. One to lie and one to listen.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
Lies TV/Movie Quotes

Marge, you know it's rude to talk when my mouth is full.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
TV/Movie Quotes

My dreams have been shattered into shards of a broken dream.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
TV/Movie Quotes

Give me liberty or… Ooooo… a jelly donut!

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
TV/Movie Quotes