Author: Bumper sticker Page 2

Who are these kids and why are they calling me Mom?

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Few women admit their age; Fewer men act it.

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Your kid may be an honors student, but you're still an idiot.

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My Dog Can Lick Anyone

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Finally 21, and Legally Able to Do Everything I've Been Doing Since I Was 15

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A bartender is just a pharmacist with a limited inventory.

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Learn from your parents' mistakes – use birth control.

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When you do a good deed, get a receipt – in case heaven is like the IRS.

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I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.

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If I throw a stick, will you leave?

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Young at Heart – Slightly Older in Other Places

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It IS as bad as you think, and they ARE out to get you.

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Hard work has a future payoff. Laziness pays off NOW.

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You're just jealous because the voices are talking to me and not you!

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Jesus loves you, but everyone else thinks you're a jerk

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Change is inevitable… except from vending machines.

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Re-Elect Nobody

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You say I'm a bitch like it's a bad thing.

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Make it idiot-proof and someone will make a better idiot.

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Not all men are annoying. Some are dead.

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When the Going Gets Tough, the Tough Use Duct Tape

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