Author: Sign Page 12

If we see you smoking we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action.

Belt your family. It's the law.

To expedite your visit please back in.

Sofa King – “Our prices are Sofa King Low”

The best piece of chicken you'll ever get without being a rooster.

Our Credit Advisor Is Mrs. Helen Waite. If You Want Credit From Us, Go To Helen Waite.

God’s Last Name Isn’t “Damn”!

CAUTION – Propellers Rip Off Heads

Rest Area Next Right

Servers Wanted All You Can Eat 4–9 PM

Please Pardon Our Tulip Show – The Deer Have Eaten the Display

You Can't Beat Our Meat!

For best results, do not leave at the crime scene.

CANDY 95… We're number one among those who say we're their favorite radio station!

Guys, No Shirt, No Service – Girls, No Shirt, No Charge

The Superstore — Unequaled in Size, Unmatched in Variety, Unrivaled Inconvenience

Beat Diabetes – Buy 5 Jr. Frostys For $1

RING MY BELL for water, ice, legal documents (divorce, etc.), solar energy products, video surveillance, security alarms.

To Avoid Flooding Please Do Not Flush Anything But Toilet Paper

Let us fill your crack!