Author: Sign Page 17

Get Circumcised & Reap the Benefits!

Persons Are Prohibited From Picking Flowers From Any But Their Own Graves

We Repair What Your Husband Fixed

Fire Alarm – Fire alarm sounds LIke: Whooop Whooop Whooop • Fire alarm looks like: white Flashing Stobe [sic]

No Motorized Vehicles – No Bikes – No Camping • Caution Heavy Traffic

Sign Maker on Vacation – Come Inside for Message

Will the last person to leave please see that the perpetual light is extinguished.

Lunch and Learn Seminar: 'Who's controlling your life?' (get your manager's permission before attending)

Members and Non Members Only

Drive Carefully – We'll Wait

Growing old is mandatory. Growing wise is optional.

Everyday low value

Speed Limit 5 Miles per hour / No vehicles beyond this point

Unattended Children Will Be Sold To the Circus

We're #1 In the #2 Business

Sleep with someone you know.

STOP – PLease Wait for Attendant – We Cannot Wash Any Grand-Ams

We Will Oil Your Sewing Machine and Adjust Tension In Your Home For $1

Confined Space Hazardous Atmosphere

Open 11AM to 11PM Midnight