Author: Sign Page 18

Open seven days a week and weekends.

We are open on Labor Day.

Why Don't You Just Go Away!

Hackers Ahead

MOEVING SALE

In memory of Leonard Ball, who hated fat people.

Beware of bargains in 1. Parachutes 2. Life preservers 3. Brain surgery 4. Eye Care

Ladies, the Poles Are Fitted For Your Safety – No Dancing

HELP WANTED – Must Not Be Dead

Please do not put towels, personal items, or small mammals in the toilet. Thanks.

Been burglarized? Get alarmed!

Speed Limit π (3.1416 MPH)

Everyday low value

Made In China

SOFA SO GOOD

Great Food (50,000 flies can't be wrong).

BRAZIER FOODS • CHEESECAKE LIZZARDS ARE HERE

Home of the Ho-Made Pies

Do Not Pee on Plastic Bag

Dick Cleaners and Drapery Service

You Don’t Work Here – Keep Out. Not Hiring