Subject: Activities » Travel

I'm often asked why I travel around the country talking politics: Is it for humanitarian reasons, community spirit, or is it for the money, the limousines or the girls? … The answers are: no, no, yes yes yes!

(1927 – 1997) Am. comedian & satirist notable for mock presidential campaign
Activities Government Politics Travel

One road trip we were stuck on the runway for seven hours. The plane kept driving and driving until we arrived at the rink and I realized we were on a bus.

Canadian hockey player
Hockey Sports Travel

We’re lost, but we’re making good time.

(1925 – 2015) baseball player, coach & manager
Activities Travel Yogi-isms

As soon as the stewardess serves the coffee, the airliner encounters turbulence.
Davis's Explanation of Roger's Law: Serving coffee on aircraft causes turbulence.

Murphy’s Laws Travel

Sometimes the road is less traveled for a reason.

Activities Proverbs Travel

The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt and a leaky tire.

Activities Autos Beliefs Problems Proverbs Travel

They [airplane oxygen masks] don’t really help you… they’re just there to muffle the screams.

(1953 – ) comedian, dancer & writer
Activities Things Travel

If God wanted us to fly, He would have given us tickets.

(1926 – ) film director, screenwriter, composer, comedian, actor & producer
Activities Beliefs God Travel

The faster the plane, the narrower the seats.

Activities Murphy’s Laws Travel

1. The last gas station for 50 miles will be closed when you get there. 2. At the moment of any departure, the level of gas in your tank depends entirely on how late you are. 3. You only run out of gas after your wife tells you to stop for gas before you run out.

Autos Murphy’s Laws Things Travel

He who hesitates is not only lost, but several miles from the next freeway exit.

Driving Murphy’s Laws Travel

My dad is Irish and my mum is Iranian, which meant that we spent most of our family holidays in Customs.

(1969 – ) American singer-songwriter & musician
People Places Travel

It always takes longer to get there than to get back.

Murphy’s Laws Time Travel

The last rush-hour express bus to your neighborhood leaves five minutes before you get off work.

Activities Murphy’s Laws Time Travel

Airline travel is hours of boredom interrupted by moments of stark terror.

disc jockey, screenwriter & humorist
Activities Emotions Fear Travel

Never, ever, fly on the airline of the country from which you are departing.

Murphy’s Laws Places Travel

Detour: The roughest distance between two points.

Activities Definitions Travel

If my dead father was alive to hear that, it would kill him.

television character, All In the Family (Carroll O’Connor)
Death Family Fathers Misspokements Situations Travel

He travels fastest who travels alone… but he hasn’t anything to do when he gets there.

Activities Murphy’s Laws Travel

Those who live closest arrive latest.

Activities Murphy’s Laws Time Travel

When traveling with children… at least one child of any number of children will request a rest room stop exactly halfway between any two given rest areas.

Activities Children Family Murphy’s Laws Travel