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Subject: Entertainment » Music

There is nothing remarkable about it; all one has to do is to hit the right keys at the right time and the instrument plays itself.

Johann Sebastian Bach

(1685 – 1750) German composer & musician

Entertainment Music

Beethoven always sounds to me like the upsetting of a bag of nails, with here and there also a dropped hammer.

John Ruskin

(1819 – 1900) English art critic, social thinker, poet & artist

Entertainment Music Reviews/Criticism Beethoven

Let me tell you about Jack's singing voice… it made his violin playing sound good.

George Burns

(1896 – 1996) comedian, actor & entertainer

Entertainment Music Jack Benny Singing Violin Voice

Jack Benny would end his act by playing a tune on his violin, so naturally he got a big cheer when he finished.

George Burns

(1896 – 1996) comedian, actor & entertainer

Entertainment Music Applause Jack Benny Violin

After conducting a concert in a small town, I once received the following note from a farmer who had attended the performance: “Dear Sir, I wish to inform you that the man who played the long thing you pull in and out only did so during the brief periods you were looking at him.

Arturo Toscanini

(1867 – 1957) Italian conductor

Entertainment Music

Hell is full of musical amateurs.

George Bernard Shaw

(1856 – 1950) Irish playwright & socialist

Beliefs Music People Amateurs Hell

Someone came too sooner.

Eugene Ormandy

(1899 – 1985) Hungarian-born conductor & violinist

Entertainment Misspokements Music

Never look at the trombones; you’ll only encourage them.

Richard Strauss

(1864 – 1949) German composer

Entertainment Music Conducting Trombones

When you are about 35 years old, something terrible always happens to music.

Stephen Race

(1921 – 2009) British composer, pianist and radio & television presenter

Age Entertainment Music

The hardest thing in the world is to start an orchestra, and the next hardest, to stop it.

Hans Richter

(1843 – 1916) Hungarian conductor

Entertainment Music Orchestras

Playing ‘Bop’ is like ‘Scrabble’ with all the vowels missing.

Duke Ellington

(1899 – 1974) American composer, pianist & bandleader

Entertainment Music Bop

Generally, he had a good ear; he didn't know the notes that well, but he played in their general vicinity.

Joan Benny

(1934 – ) daughter of Jack Benny and Mary Livingstone

Entertainment Music Jack Benny Violin

Australia's gift to insomniacs; it's nothing but the blonde singing the bland.

Minnie Riperton

(1947 – 1979) American singer

Entertainment Insults Music Olivia Newton-John Singing

We are not used to playing the kind of venues that don't have a drain in the middle of the floor.

Rich Hall

(1954 – ) American comedian, writer & musician

Entertainment Music Places Venues

Longfellow is to poetry what the barrel-organ is to music.

Van Wyck Brooks

(1886 – 1963) literary critic, biographer & historian

Insults Music Reading/Writing Henry Wadsworth Longfellow Poetry

The scratch on the record is through the song you like most.

Ron's Observation

Entertainment Murphy’s Laws Music Records

It's bad when they don't perform your operas – but when they do, it's far worse.

Charles-Camille Saint-Saëns

(1835 – 1921) French Late-Romantic composer, conductor & pianist

Entertainment Insults Music Situations To composer Dame Ethel Smyth

The bagpipes sound exactly the same when you have finished learning them as when you start.

Thomas Beecham

(1879 – 1961) English conductor

Entertainment Music Bagpipes Sound

When an opera star sings her head off, she usually improves her appearance.

Victor Borge

(1909 – 2000) Danish-born comedian & pianist

Appearance Entertainment Music Opera

There are two golden rules for an orchestra: start together and finish together; the public doesn’t give a damn what goes on inbetween.