Subject: Miscellaneous (Page 17)

I wish I had a dollar for every time I spent a dollar, because then, yahoo, I’d have all my money back.

Miscellaneous

Got a face like a mile of unpaved road.

Miscellaneous

Out of soap

Miscellaneous

If they ever build a statue of me, I hope they don’t have me with my mouth wide open and holding a sign that says “I love rotten eggs.”

Miscellaneous

Useful as a broken leg.

Miscellaneous

Sloppier than two pigs in a bucket

Miscellaneous

Go off half-cocked

Miscellaneous

If growing up in the ’80s taught me one thing, it’s that my friends and I should have found a treasure map by now.


Miscellaneous

I tried water polo and my horse drowned.

(1964 – ) English comedian, writer, actor & musician
Miscellaneous

Some folks say it was a miracle. St. Francis suddenly appeared and knocked the next pitch clean over the fence. Other folks say it was just a lucky swing.

Miscellaneous

Hotter than a two dollar pistol.

Miscellaneous

I wanted to be that cranky old guy that stands on his porch and yells at the neighborhood kids.

(1928 – 1994) American actor
Miscellaneous

Well, slap my head and call me silly.

Miscellaneous

If he had a brain and was a bird, he’d fly backwards.

Miscellaneous

Messed up as a soup sandwich

Miscellaneous

A daily festival of human suffering.

American professional road racing cyclist
Miscellaneous

like trying to herd cats

Miscellaneous

Gooder than grits

Miscellaneous

Laugh, clown, laugh; this is what I tell myself whenever I dress up like Bozo.

Miscellaneous

You look like you were pulled through a knothole backwards.

Miscellaneous

I’m not going to make the same mistake once.

(1937 – ) American actor, producer, screenwriter & director
Miscellaneous