Subject: Miscellaneous (Page 51)

If Mr. Selwyn calls again, show him up: if I am alive I shall be delighted to see him; and if I am dead he would like to see me.

,

(1705 – 1774) British politician, 1st Baron Holland
Miscellaneous

Go hog wild

Miscellaneous

One-third sap and two-thirds Eleanor.

(1884 – 1980) author & wit
Miscellaneous

Oh shine!

Miscellaneous

… more than Carter’s got pills.

Miscellaneous

If Jesus had known that his image would end up on Justin Bieber’s calf, he would’ve never started Christianity.

(1974 – ) American comedian
Miscellaneous

In a New York minute.

Miscellaneous

Marriage is a book of which the first chapter is written in poetry and the remaining chapters in prose

(1898 – 1983) English author, playwright, journalist, composer & public speaker
Miscellaneous

Like Claude Harris’ mule

Miscellaneous

Who put a bee in her bonnet?

Miscellaneous

One way I think you can tell if you have a curse on you is if you open a box of toothpicks and they all fly up and stick in your face.

Miscellaneous

A close chewer and a tight spitter.

Miscellaneous

Queen Of My Double-Wide Trailer

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As cold as a wet Christmas

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Corduroy Pants

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Lying like a snake in the grass.

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I went to the barber and got my ears lowered.

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Side gal

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He’s so dumb he couldn’t piss his name in the snow.

Miscellaneous

Practical Demonkeeping


Miscellaneous

A kiss is like a fight, with mouths.

(1978 – ) American actress, writer & comedian
Miscellaneous