Subject: Miscellaneous (Page 52)

If a bird had his brains, he fly backwards.

Miscellaneous

Happier than a two peckerd billy goat.

Miscellaneous

Return an answer.

Miscellaneous

Cooler than a flip side of a down pillow.

Miscellaneous

… like a turd in the punchbowl

Miscellaneous

Better an empty house than an unwelcomed guest.

Miscellaneous

What are they planting to grow the seedless watermelon?

(1954 – ) comedian & television actor
Miscellaneous

The damned thing works!

(1906 – 1971) American inventor & television pioneer
Miscellaneous

I’ll snatch you bald headed.

Miscellaneous

You learn more character on the two-yard line than anywhere else in life.

American football player, coach & administrator
Miscellaneous

He’s screw a snake in a sandstorm if someone’d hold it out straight for him.

Miscellaneous

You’d walk her down the front row of a revival meeting.

Miscellaneous

Deaf as a doorknob & blind as a bat.

Miscellaneous

What if nothing exists and we’re all in somebody’s dream? .. or what'’s worse, what if only that fat guy in the third row exists?

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Miscellaneous

Chestnut time

Miscellaneous

If Mr. Selwyn calls again, show him up: if I am alive I shall be delighted to see him; and if I am dead he would like to see me.

,

(1705 – 1774) British politician, 1st Baron Holland
Miscellaneous

It’s hotter than a fritter!

Miscellaneous

Hearing nuns’ confessions is like being stoned to death with popcorn.

(1965 – ) film & television actor
Miscellaneous

One foot in the grave

Miscellaneous

I’m going to paint your back porch red if you keep talkin like that!

Miscellaneous

Here’s a suggestion for a new animal; if some new ones get created or evolve: something that stings you, then laughs at you.

Miscellaneous