Subject: Places (Page 22)

You can tell German wine from vinegar by the label.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Alcohol Food/Drink Places

The most serious charge which can be brought against New England is not Puritanism but February.

(1893 – 1970) American writer, critic & naturalist
Cold Places Science/Weather

Chicago is not the most corrupt American city, it’s the most theatrically corrupt.


Places

In America nothing dies easier than tradition.

(1925 – ) columnist & journalist
America Death Places

In America there are two classes of travel: first class and with children.

(1889 – 1945) actor, author & humorist
Activities America Places Travel

The first place to look for anything is the last place you would expect to find it.

Murphy’s Laws Places Things

Florida has so many strip clubs, they need to change their state flag to just a brass pole.

(1964 – ) American writer, stand-up comedian, actress, television host
Places

We are not used to playing the kind of venues that don't have a drain in the middle of the floor.

(1954 – ) American comedian, writer & musician
Entertainment Music Places

France has neither winter nor summer nor morals; apart from these drawbacks it is a fine country.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Places

There is, in fact, no law or government at all [in Italy]; and it is wonderful how well things go on without them.

(1788 – 1824) English poet
Places

I am the only Iranian comedian in the world… and that's three more than Germany!

(1965 – ) British-Iranian comedian, actor & writer
Places

Dubai is what would happen if you gave a 12-year-old a trillion dollars to redecorate his bedroom.

(1619 – 1683) French statesman
Places

We have a firm commitment to Europe; we are a part of Europe.

(1947 – ) U.S. vice president & politician
Misspokements Places

Do people in Australia, call the rest of the world, "Up Over"?

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Communication Language Places Speech

England is the only country in the world where the food is more dangerous than the sex.

(1934 – ) comedian
Food/Drink Places Sex

There is no distinctly native American criminal class except Congress.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
America Congress Government Places Problems

Just been with my girlfriend to a nice little place run by some Italians… it was Italy.

(1968 – ) English comedian, writer, director & musician
Places

If I had that kind of money, I wouldn't come to Vietnam, I'd send for it.

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor
Money Places Wealth

Russian Communism is the illegitimate child of Karl Marx and Catherine the Great.

(1883 – 1967) British prime minister & politician
Government Places

It sounds like typewriters eating tin foil being kicked down the stairs.

(1971 – ) Irish comedian, actor & writer
Communication Places Speech

A government survey reveals the prime minister is doing the work of two men… Laurel and Hardy.

(1930 – 2016) Scottish stand-up comedian, actor, writer & broadcaster
England Government