Subject: Sports (Page 120)

The rest of the field.

American professional golfer
Golf Sports

You can run a lot of plays when your X is twice as big as the other guy's O.

American basketball player & coach
Basketball Sports

Sure, as long as he ties a 56 lb. weight to each leg.

English boxing champion
Boxing Sports

It would be like the elephants standing up on two feet. It would be like the man being shot out of the cannon. It would be like a woman with a beard down to the floor. It would be the greatest show on earth.

(1949 – ) American boxing champion
Boxing Sports

This is the second most exciting indoor sport, and the other one shouldn't have spectators.

American sports executive
Activities Basketball Sports

Interviewer: Did you graduate from Auburn?
Charles: No, but I have a couple people working for me who did.

(1963 – ) American professional basketball player & sports personality
Basketball Education School Sports

They say something to me sometimes. But I don't understand all the words yet. So I smile at them and then I go score goal.

Russian hockey player
Hockey Sports

Allen S. Sothoron pitched his initials off yesterday.

(1886 – 1969) American journalist & humorist
Baseball Sports

The devoted golfer is an anguished soul who has learned a lot about putting, just as an avalanche victim has learned a lot about snow.

(1929 – ) American author & sportswriter
Golf Sports

When I went to Catholic high school in Philadelphia, we just had one coach for football and basketball. He took all of us who turned out and had us run through a forest. The ones who ran into the trees were on the football team.

American basketball coach
Basketball Football Sports

Maybe that will distract the Falcon quarterback.

(1923 – 2001) American football coach
Football Sports

For his salad, you just pour vinegar and oil on your lawn and let him graze.

American football player
Football Sports

God's busy; they'll have to make do with me.

(1923 – 2001) American football coach
Football Sports

After the third flip, I lost control…

American auto racer
Auto racing Sports

He's standing there making a sitting target of himself.

English boxing manager & trainer
Boxing Misspokements Sports

All of his saves have come during relief appearances.

(1922 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer
Baseball Misspokements Sports

The only thing I've noticed is that when I come into the locker room, they all bow.

(1956 – ) Czech American tennis player
Sports

I'd never buy my girl a watch… she's already got a clock over the stove.

(1963 – ) American professional basketball player & sports personality
Basketball Sports Things

And there’s no damage to the car… except to the car itself.

(1923 – ) English motorsport commentator
Misspokements Sports

I do not participate in any sport with ambulances at the bottom of a hill.

(1927 – 1996) columnist & humorist
Activities Sports

Everything Tyson's got has 'goodnight' written on it.

American boxing referee
Boxing Sports