Subject: Sports (Page 67)

I occasionally get birthday cards from fans, but it's often the same message… they hope it's my last.

American baseball umpire
Baseball Sports

Frankly, that’s tantamount to the head of the White Star line saying the company’s next voyage will be considered a success if it fares better than the Titanic.

Canadian hockey player
Hockey Sports

This series has been swings and pendulums all the way through.

British sports commentator
Misspokements Sports

I’m not fat.

(1950 – ) American boxer & actor
Boxing Sports

Gimme:  An agreement between two losers who can't putt.

(1907 – 1987) American journalist & author
Golf Situations Sports

The tactical difference between Association Football and Rugby with its varieties seems to be that in the former, the ball is the missile, in the latter, men are the missiles

English schoolmaster, sexologist, anthropologist & sports journalist
Sports

Yankees' owner George Steinbrenner is a first-and-ten capitalist in a bunt-and-run world.

American sportswriter
Baseball Communication Sports

 It’s obvious these Russian swimmers are determined to do well on American soil.

British swimmer & sports commentator
Misspokements Sports

The quarterback’s spending so much time behind the center that he may jeopardize his right to lead a Boy Scout troop.

(1953 – ) comedian, political commentator and television & radio personality
Football Situations Sports

If (Pete) Rose’s streak was still intact, with that single to left, the fans would be throwing babies out of the upper deck.

(1924 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer
Baseball Misspokements Sports

I believed in drug testing a long time ago… all through the Sixties I tested everything.

American baseball pitcher
Activities Baseball Drugs Sports

The side has been held together by needles and sticking plaster.

Rugby coach
Sports

Why would anyone expect him to come out smarter? … he went to prison for three years, not Princeton.

(1922 – ) boxing trainer & manager
Boxing Intelligence Sports

I was never nervous when I had the ball, but when I let go I was scared to death.

(1908 – 1989) American baseball player
Baseball Sports

I would not be bothered if we lost every game as long as we won the league.

Australian football player
Football Misspokements Sports

The Mets have gotten their leadoff hitter on base only once in this inning.

(1922 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer
Baseball Misspokements Sports

Why should I smile? They’d be throwing things at me if I lost.

English jockey
Sports

If I get run into again, I'm taking someone with me. I lost one knee. I'll take a head if it happens again.

Canadian hockey goaltender
Hockey Sports

I'm not into sports. If someone told me I had athlete's foot, I'd say that's not my foot!

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian
People Self Sports

He's great to the old guys. He's got one trainer just to treat varicose veins.

(1935 – 2012) American football player, sports announcer & actor
Age Football Old Sports

It's like my ex-wife… 21 different personalities and seven of them hated me.

American football coach
Football Marriage Sports Wives