Author: Classified ad Page 17

PIG – I saw you at Tiki Bobs. You grabbed my butt and I told you if you did that again I’d kill you. You did. I need your address now. Phone…

NEW LISTING – CARBONDALE – Move right into this 3 bedroom, 1.25 bath home, featuring foyer with split staircase, mysterious hidden commode, off street parking yard. $79,900.

Gregory W. Le May for State Representative – The 3 E’s – Education – Employment – Accountability…

This is the model home for your future. It was panned by Better Homes and Gardens.

COCKTAIL LOST in King St. area. Call 616-….

MATH TUDAR NEEDED for Intermediate Algebra, needed ASAP! Call…

Cute kitten for sale. Two cents or best offer.

10th Annual Southeastern Guide Dog BBQ– $10.00 per person…

Tired of cleaning yourself. Let me do it.

Cure Sleepiness Right Away – Time for Use: Long-Distance Driving, Drunk Driving, Night Driving…

Semi-Annual after-Christmas Sale.

SECRETARY – needed for quick lube. 6 Days. Call… Stuyvesant Ave, Union, NJ.

Mediterranean Villa – rooms located just steps to the ocean/park/and golf course. Sunsets every day. $209,950

Turkey Shoot Slated – The Malheur Gun Club will hold a turkey shoot Sunday at the Vale Airport… Winners will receive hams.

Now I know what to do the next time my patents die… – If you are inheriting someone’s IRA/401K/TSP or Annuity…

OUR SOFA seats the whole mob and it's made of 100% Italian leather.

American Legion Auxilary Unit 3 – Oct. 9 4 p.m. Spaghetti Dinner With Salad, Bread, And Dessert $5.00 $5,50 Take Out – 2nd Thurs. Of Every Monday

PRO PAIN TANK – Camping Size. $20 (408)266-….

WANTED – Workaholic for special department, all shifts. Highly reliable – no vacation or sick leave. Must be flexible, intelligent and friendly.

Sandy Clause – Attorney at Law – The Singleton Law Firm – 4050 Linwood Ave…

Hanging Yourself Could Be Painful So Get A Pro To Do It