Author: Epitaph Page 28

Here lies (the Lord have mercy on her) One of Her Majesty's maids of honour: she was young, slender, and pretty; she died a maid — the more's the pity.

Epitaphs

Upon the fifth day of November, Christ's College lost a privy member; Cupid and death did both their arrows nick, Cupid shot short, but death did hit the prick; Women lament and maidens make great moans, Because the prick is laid beneath the stones.

Epitaphs

Under this stone Lies Billy Joe Bob Stealing chickens Was his last job

Epitaphs

Tears cannot restore her –– therefore I weep.

Epitaphs

Here I lie, snuck as a bug in a rug – Two rows down in same cemetery – Here I lie, snugger than that other bugger

Epitaphs

This we must own in justice to her shade, `Tis the first bad exit Oldfield ever made.

Epitaphs

Mary, Mary, quite contrary How does your garden grow? Quite well, I bet, Since it's well fed By her body decomposing below.

Epitaphs

Due to lack of ground in this cemetery, two bodies are buried in this one plot. One of them was a politician, the other was an honest man.

Epitaphs

Here lies Donnie Cornwell, good and dead. In an extra large coffin to fit his extra large head.

Epitaphs

Here lies Dave Jordan – His last words were a shame… 'There's a light at the end of the tunnel'… Unfortunately it was a train

Epitaphs

Here lies one who never lied before. And one who never will lie More. To which there need be no More said.

Epitaphs

Here lie Walker's particles.

Epitaphs

Ma Loves Pa – Pa Loves Women – Ma Caught Pa, With 2 in Swimmin – Here Lies Pa…

Lawrence L. Cook Jr. 10-29-1934 — 8-1-2004

Epitaphs

Poor Martha Snell, she's gone away. She would if she could, but she could not stay; she'd two bad legs, and a baddish cough, but her legs it was that carried her off.

Epitaphs

Praises on tombs are trifles vainly spent; a man's good name is his best monument.

Epitaphs

I thought my doctor said I was heading for a rave.

Doctors Epitaphs

See, I told you I was SICK!

Epitaphs

Here lies Scott Jacobson – Who came upon an evil lich, he didn't even think to run, and ended up in this ditch

Epitaphs

Assuming my death has occurred, and five doctors have concurred. Please REVIVE me! If you can get no breath, take the person who caused my death, and bury them right beside me.

Epitaphs

Sacred to the memory of My husband John Barnes Who died January 3, 1803. His comely young widow, aged 23, has many qualifications of a good wife, and yearns to be comforted.

Epitaphs

“Don’t Try”

Epitaphs