Author: Noel Coward

The audience would have booed and hissed after the first act, but you can't do that and yawn at the same time.

(1899 – 1973) English playwright, actor, composer, director & songwriter
Reviews/Criticism

Television is for appearing on, not looking at.

(1899 – 1973) English playwright, actor, composer, director & songwriter
Entertainment Television

Having to read a footnote resembles having to go downstairs to answer the door while in the midst of making love.

(1899 – 1973) English playwright, actor, composer, director & songwriter
Communication Reading/Writing

He has his head in the clouds and his feet in the box office.

(1899 – 1973) English playwright, actor, composer, director & songwriter
Communication Insults Reviews/Criticism

Do I believe in God? … Let’s say we have a working relationship.

(1899 – 1973) English playwright, actor, composer, director & songwriter
Beliefs God

Dear Randolph, utterly unspoilt by failure.

(1899 – 1973) English playwright, actor, composer, director & songwriter
Failure Insults

Literary diarrhea.

(1899 – 1973) English playwright, actor, composer, director & songwriter
Insults Reviews/Criticism

I like long walks… especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.

(1899 – 1973) English playwright, actor, composer, director & songwriter
Activities People

I see her as one great stampede of lips directed at the nearest derriere.

(1899 – 1973) English playwright, actor, composer, director & songwriter
Appearance Insults

She had much in common with Hitler, only no mustache.

(1899 – 1973) English playwright, actor, composer, director & songwriter
Insults

I don't believe in astrology; the only stars I can blame for my failures are those that walk about the stage.

(1899 – 1973) English playwright, actor, composer, director & songwriter
Failure

Just as long as the real thing and twice as noisy.

(1899 – 1973) English playwright, actor, composer, director & songwriter
Reviews/Criticism

People are wrong when they say opera is not what it used to be… it is what it used to be; that is what's wrong with it.

(1899 – 1973) English playwright, actor, composer, director & songwriter
Entertainment Music Reviews/Criticism

She took her curtain calls as though she has just been un-nailed from the cross.

(1899 – 1973) English playwright, actor, composer, director & songwriter
Reviews/Criticism

Two things should be cut – the second act and the child's throat.

(1899 – 1973) English playwright, actor, composer, director & songwriter
Reviews/Criticism

Extraordinary how potent cheap music is.

(1899 – 1973) English playwright, actor, composer, director & songwriter
Entertainment Music

Success took me to her bosom like a maternal boa constrictor.

(1899 – 1973) English playwright, actor, composer, director & songwriter
Success

Having to read a footnote resembles having to go downstairs to answer the door while in the midst of making love.

(1899 – 1973) English playwright, actor, composer, director & songwriter
Books Communication Reading/Writing Sex

Wit ought to be a glorious treat like caviar; never spread it about like marmalade.

(1899 – 1973) English playwright, actor, composer, director & songwriter
Entertainment Intelligence

Squash – that’s not exercise, it’s flagellation.

(1899 – 1973) English playwright, actor, composer, director & songwriter
Sports

She stopped the show – but then the show wasn't traveling very fast.

(1899 – 1973) English playwright, actor, composer, director & songwriter
Acting Communication Entertainment Reviews/Criticism