Author: Russell Brand

I thought I was promiscuous, but it turns out I was just thorough.

(1975 – ) English comedian, actor & writer
Sex

Murderers – stop murdering; everyone will die eventually… just sit down and be patient.

(1975 – ) English comedian, actor & writer
Conflict Death Killing

If your body is 90 per cent water why have you got to drink water all the time? Why can’t you just have some crisps?

(1975 – ) English comedian, actor & writer
Appearance Body

How long is it polite to pretend to continue to listen to someone after they’ve revealed they’ve got a boyfriend?

(1975 – ) English comedian, actor & writer
Characteristics Communication

No wonder Bob Geldof is such an expert on famine… he’s been dining off I Don’t Like Mondays for 30 years.

(1975 – ) English comedian, actor & writer
Insults

Fame loses a little of its cache when you have to tell people that you have it.

(1975 – ) English comedian, actor & writer
Communication Speech Success