Subject: Sports

There are rough players and there are dirty players. I’m rough and dirty.

Slovak-born Canadian hockey player

Tommy Smith wasn’t born, he was quarried.

Scottish football player & manager

I told them sandwiches.

(1949 – ) American boxing champion

I can close any cut in the world in 50 seconds, so long as it ain’t a total beheading.

boxing cut-man

On this team, we are all united in a common goal: to keep my job.

(1937 – ) football coach, sportscaster, author & speaker

I never did say that you can’t be a nice guy and win; I said that if I was playing third base and my mother rounded third with the winning run, I’d trip her.

(1906 – 1991) American baseball player, coach & manager

Aerodynamics are for people who can’t build engines.

Italian motor racing driver & entrepreneur

If you take your eye off Gretzky, he’ll bank it off your skate, your back, your helmet or your wife. I could hang a nickel in the net and he’d hit it every time.

Canadian hockey player

My clubs are well used, but unfortunately not used well.

You’ve got to come in with more than a left hook and a bad haircut to beat Lennox Lewis.

British and Canadian boxing champion

There is a thin line between genius and insanity, and in Larry’s case it was sometimes so thin you could see him drifting back and forth.

(1906 – 1991) American baseball player, coach & manager

Finish last in your league and they call you idiot; finish last in medical school and they call you doctor.

(1922 – 2002) American college basketball coach

I’ll never make the mistake of being 70 again.

(1890 – 1975) American baseball manager

I really lack the words to compliment myself today.

skier

There is one word in baseball that says it all, and that word is, ‘You never know.’

professional baseball player

The place was so empty, they could have had archery practice.

American football coach

If Mike Tyson gets any better, he’ll be hitting Lou Rawls while he sings the National Anthem.

American television personality

He has everything a boxer needs except speed, stamina, a punch, and ability to take punishment. In other words, he owns a pair of shorts.

(1919 – ) American sportswriter

These are my new shoes. They’re good shoes. They won’t make you rich like me, they won’t make you rebound like me, they definitely won’t make you handsome like me. They’ll only make you have shoes like me. That’s it.

(1963 – ) American professional basketball player & sports personality

Fairway: The well-kept and seldom used portion of a golf course.

In a perfect world, a fair world, Bob Hayes should be forced to carry a small calf on his shoulder when he runs the dashes…Mark Spitz, in all fairness, would swim with a sea anchor…[and] Ella Fitzgerald must sing every note with a mouth full of Tootsie Rolls.

(1919 – ) American sportswriter