Subject: Classifieds (Page 26)

Pollard Used Cars – Limited Time Offer! – $299 per month – For the Rest of Your Life

Classifieds

COME TO WORK for Subway and have your dreams crushed like the rest of us. Weekends required. 941-…. after 2 pm.

Classifieds

WANTED – Workaholic for special department, all shifts. Highly reliable – no vacation or sick leave. Must be flexible, intelligent and friendly.

Classifieds

Finally – a calculator that has no equal.

Classifieds

200 PLAYBOY MAGAZINES & other Adult Magazines, will trade for guns. Call…

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Ploughing the loneliest furrow. Nineteen personal ads and counting. Only one reply. It was my mother telling me not to forget the bread on my way home from B&Q. Man, 51.

Classifieds

Corduroy Pillows: They're making headlines!

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Creative daily specials, including select offerings of beef, foul, fresh vagetables, salads, quiche.

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2 wire mesh butchering gloves, 1 5-finger, 1 3-finger, pair: $15

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Paint job, $220. Come in for a free estimate.

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Mrs. Jody Defries is pleased to announce the arrival of Elijah Joel – 8 pounds 10 ounces… and the loss of twenty pounds.

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1 man, 7 woman hot tub – $850/offer

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COCKTAIL LOST in King St. area. Call 616-….

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Four-poster bed, 101 years old. Perfect for antique lover.

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Smith & Wesson – For the Bride To Be! – Model 642 .38 Special $419.97, Save $50…

Classifieds

Lustful? Sinful? Sexual? These are all words not used in conjunction with my feeble, limp form for at least 32 years. You are a woman to 40 with high class looks and low class mind. I am an ever growing vessel of limp wristed sexual energy just waiting to be shook. You may call me sir. box no. 32/02

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MUST SELL: 3 Grave Spaces in Laureland, very reasonable. Plus air conditioner.

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SPANISH TOOTER NEEDED FOR A 7 year old student, learn to speak and write fluently. Call after 6 pm. 467-….

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Cows, calves never bred… also 1 gay bull for sale.

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Government employer looking for candidates. Criminal background required.

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Wanted: Hard working, experienced farm woman. Household and field work; know how to cook; must own tracter –- send photo of tractor.

Classifieds