Subject: Government » Military

Never share a foxhole with anyone braver than you are.

Military Murphy’s Laws

All battles are fought at the junction of two or more map sheets… printed at different scales.

Military Murphy’s Laws

No matter which way you have to march, its always uphill.

Military

If it moves, salute it; if it doesn't move, pick it up; if you can't pick it up, paint it.

Military Murphy’s Laws

Incoming fire has the right-of-way.

Military Murphy’s Laws

Mines are equal opportunity weapons.

Arms Military Murphy’s Laws

If we had less statesmanship we could get along with fewer battleships.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Arms Conflict Government Military Things War

The complexity of a weapon is inversely proportional to the IQ of the weapon's operator.

Arms Intelligence Military

The more you sweat in peace, the less you bleed in war.

Health Military Murphy’s Laws

It's not the bullet with your name on it; it's the shrapnel addressed to ‘occupant’ you've got to worry about.

Military

The only thing more accurate than incoming enemy fire is incoming friendly fire.

Military Murphy’s Laws

Density of fire increases proportionally to the curiousness of the target.

Military Murphy’s Laws

[When parachuting] it is generally inadvisable to eject directly over the area you just bombed.

Military Murphy’s Laws

If the enemy is in range, so are you!

Military Murphy’s Laws

All other things being equal, the side with the simplest uniforms wins.

Appearance Clothing Military Murphy’s Laws

The difficult we do immediately; the impossible takes a little while longer.

Military Murphy’s Laws

A Purple Heart just proves that were you smart enough to think of a plan, stupid enough to try it, and lucky enough to survive.

Military

Make it too tough for the enemy to get in and you can't get out.

Military Murphy’s Laws

My hope is that gays will be running the world, because then there would be no war… just a greater emphasis on military apparel.

(1952 – ) comedian, actress & writer
Clothing Conflict Government Military War

There are three types of intelligence: the intelligence of man, the intelligence of animals and the intelligence of the military… in that order.

(1911 – 1994) German film director & producer
Animals Intelligence Military

The easy way is always mined.

Military Murphy’s Laws