Subject: Government (Page 31)

In the wake of the killing of Osama bin Laden President Obama’s approval rating jumped to 56 percent, his highest in two years… which shows there is literally nothing he can do to please the other 44 percent.

(1973 – ) American comedian, actor & television host
Politics TV/Movie Quotes

We would all like to vote for the best man but he is never a candidate.

(1868 – 1930) cartoonist, humorist & journalist
People Politics

We don’t just have egg on our face; we have omelette all over our suits.

(1940 – ) American television journalist & author
Elections/Voting Government

Ever notice how many government officials make their raises effective long before they ever are?

fictional mascot and cover boy of Mad, an American humor magazine
Government Money

Bad law is more likely to be supplemented than repealed.

Government Murphy’s Laws

I think it will be a clash between the political will and the administrative won’t.

(1943 – ) English film director, comedy writer & actor
Government Politics

All other things being equal, the side with the simplest uniforms wins.

Appearance Clothing Military Murphy’s Laws

Why is it that if you take advantage of a tax break and you’re a corporation, you’re a smart businessman, but if you take advantage of something you need to not be hungry, you’re a moocher?

(1962 – ) American political satirist, writer, television host & comedian
Government Taxes

Democracy means government by discussion, but it is only effective if you can stop people talking.

(1883 – 1967) British prime minister & politician
Democracy Government

In an autocracy, one person has his way; in an aristocracy a few people have their way; in a democracy no one has his way.

(1935 – ) British writer
Democracy Government

If you want the government off your back, get your hands out of its pockets.

(1936 – ) U.S. Senator (Colorado)
Government

You can lead a man to Congress, but you can't make him think.

(1908 – 2002) comedian, radio & television actor
Congress Government Intelligence Wisdom

Diplomat: If you have the advantage over someone, and you lead him to think that he has the advantage over you, without giving him the chance to take advantage of you.

Definitions Government

If it moves, salute it; if it doesn't move, pick it up; if you can't pick it up, paint it.

Military Murphy’s Laws

I’ve still got a lot to learn about Washington… Thursday, I accidentally spent some of my own money.

U.S. Senator (1942 – 2015) U.S. senator (Tennessee) & actor
Government Places

Without discipline the Army would just be a bunch of guys wearing the same color clothing.

(1939 – 2000) American actor
Military TV/Movie Quotes

The Republicans are the party that says government doesn't work and then gets elected and proves it.

(1947 – ) author, humorist & satirist
Government Politicians

Peace: In international affairs, a period of cheating between two periods of fighting.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Communication Definitions Fights Politics Time

This is not the first time that Europe has been passive while a Jew-hating tyrant with a weird looking mustache killed the people by giving them gas… obviously I'm talking about Chef Boyardee.

(1970 – ) American comedian, writer & actress
Government People

Traffic congestion increases in proportion to the length of time the street is supervised by a traffic control officer.

Autos Government Murphy’s Laws

Presidents don’t do it to their wives; they do it to their country.

(1926 – ) film director, screenwriter, composer, comedian, actor & producer
Activities Government President Sex Wives