Subject: Insults (Page 35)

Every politician should have been born an orphan and remain a bachelor.

(1912 – 2007) U.S. first lady, wife of Lyndon Johnson
Government Insults Politicians

Some people say Birmingham looks great in the summer. I reckon it looks better in the rear view mirror.

Canadian stand-up comedian, actor & writer
Insults Places

I could never learn to like her, except on a raft at sea with no other provisions in sight.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Insults

Don King is one of the great humanitarians of our time. He has risen above that great term, prejudice. He has screwed everybody he has ever been around. Hog, dog, or frog, it don't matter to Don. If you got a quarter, he wants the first 26 cents.

(1950 – ) American boxer & actor
Boxing Insults Sports

He has the lucidity which is the byproduct of a fundamentally sterile mind.

(1897 – 1960) Welsh labor leader & politician
Insults Intelligence

He stood on the flat road to heaven and buttered slides to hell for all the rest.

(1841 – 1935) American jurist & Supreme Court justice
Insults

They’re talking about banning cigarette smoking now in any place that’s used by ten or more people in a week, which, I guess, means that Madonna can’t even smoke in bed.

(1956 – ) comedian, television host, social critic & political commentator
Insults

To me Pound remains the exquisite showman without the show.

(1894 – 1964) American screenwriter, director, producer, playwright & novelist
Insults

He looks as though he’s been weaned on a pickle.

(1884 – 1980) author & wit
Appearance Insults

The next time anyone asks you ‘What is Bertrand Russell’s Philosophy?’ the correct answer is ‘What year please?’

(1902 – 1989) American philosopher
Insults

Don Rickles is the funniest man in show business… but don't go by me; I'm drunk.

(1917 – 1995) singer, actor & comedian
Insults

The trouble with Ian [Fleming] is that he gets off with women because he can’t get on with them.

(1901 – 1990) British novelist
Insults People Women

I think a lot of Bernstein… but not as much as he does.

(1906 – 1972) pianist, composer, author, comedian & actor
Insults

He is able to turn an unplotted, unworkable manuscript into an unplotted and unworkable manuscript with a lot of sex.


Insults

I would not want Jimmy Carter and his men in charge of snake control in Ireland.

(1916 – 2005) American politician & poet
Beliefs Insults Opinion

She's about as feminine as a sidewalk drill.

(1925 – ) U.S. senator (Alabama)
Insults

A sheep in sheep’s clothing.

(1874 – 1965) British prime minister, politician, statesman & orator
Insults

I have nothing but confidence in you, and very little of that.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Characteristics Insults

He was one of those men who possess almost every gift, except the gift of the power to use them.

(1819 – 1875) English priest, university professor, historian & novelist
Insults Intelligence People

He looked like a half-melted rubber bulldog.

(1925 – ) American author and literary, theater & film critic
Appearance Insults

If he’d been making shell cases during the war it might have been better for music.

(1835 – 1921) French Late-Romantic composer, conductor & pianist
Entertainment Insults Music