Subject: Money (Page 26)

If someone says, "I'm expensive" – believe them.

Money Murphy’s Laws

A little incompatibility is the spice of life, as long as he has income and she is pattable.

(1902 – 1971) American humorist & poet
Appearance Body Money Situations Women

It is a truth universally acknowledge, that a single man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a wife.

(1775 – 1817) English novelist
Money Wives

God shows his contempt for wealth by the kind of person he selects to receive it.

(1858 – 1932) American physicist, physician & humorist
Money People Wealth

The conviction of the rich that the poor are happier is no more foolish than the conviction of the poor that the rich are.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Happiness Intelligence Money Poverty Wealth

Whatever goes us, stays up.

Government Money Murphy’s Laws Taxes

He once gave Gracie a coupon for a year’s subscription to a magazine as a gift – and all she had to do was fill it out and send it in with a check.

(1896 – 1996) comedian, actor & entertainer
Frugal Money

I knew something was wrong with the economy when the shampoo girl at my salon closed on a six bedroom house.

(1964 – ) American writer, stand-up comedian, actress, television host
Money Situations

Bing (Crosby) doesn't pay income tax; he just calls the government and says, 'How much do you boys need?'

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor
Government Money Taxes Wealth

Maybe money corrupts the character; but lack of money isn't going to improve it either.

(1902 – 1968) novelist
Characteristics Money

I can make more generals, but horses cost money.

(1809 – 1865) 16th U.S. president
Animals Government Military Money

Stand-Up [comedy] is a lot like sex; there's a lot of crying involved and I get paid to do it.

(1982 – ) American actress & comedian
Entertainment Money Sex

Money is what you’d get on beautifully without if only other people weren’t so crazy about it.

Money

When you drop change at a vending machine, the pennies will fall nearby, while all the other coins will roll out of sight.

Money Murphy’s Laws

If the hours are long enough and the pay is short enough, someone will say it's women's work.

Money People Women Work

The most efficient labor-saving device is still money.

(1908 – 1980) businessman, humorist
Money

Experience is a good teacher, but she sends in terrific bills.

(1861 – 1950) American writer
Money Time

I've never been a millionaire but I just know I'd be darling at it.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Characteristics Money Wealth

Oh God, bills, bills, bills. … Honestly Baldrick, sometimes I feel like a pelican – whichever way I turn, I’ve still got an enormous bill in front of me.

(1955 – ) English actor
Money TV/Movie Quotes

You can make a killing in the theatre, but not a living.

Money Murphy’s Laws

Utility is when you have one telephone, luxury is when you have two, opulence is when you have three – and paradise is when you have none.

(1926 – ) newspaper columnist
Life Money Situations