Subject: Places » America (Page 7)

If soccer was an American soft drink, it would be Diet Pepsi.

(1946 – 1994) writer & humorist
America Places Sports

If this country was a person it would be a used car salesman with a flamethrower. – America

(1957 – 2007) American stand-up comedian & actor
America Places

Thanks to the Interstate Highway System, it is now possible to travel from coast to coast without seeing anything.

(1934 – 1997) journalist
Activities America Autos Places Travel

In America there are two classes of travel: first class and with children.

(1889 – 1945) actor, author & humorist
Activities America Places Travel

America better beware of a candidate who is willing to stretch reality in order to win points.

(1946 – ) 43rd U.S. president
America Elections/Voting Government

America is a melting pot, the people at the bottom get burned while all the scum floats to the top.

American folksinger & activist
America Places

California is the only state in the union where you can fall asleep under a rose bush in full bloom and freeze to death.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer
America Places

The best reason I can think of for not running for President of the United States is that you have to shave twice a day.

(1900 – 1965) diplomat & Democratic politician
America Appearance Government Places President

I want to succeed in America where, unlike Britain, they do not regard ambition as being the same as eating babies.

(1962 – ) English stand-up comedian & actor
America Places Success

When you're born into this world, you're given a ticket to the freak show; if you're born in America you get a front row seat.

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author
America Places

America is like the really bad flatmate of the world: ‘Oh sorry, did I break all your shit? I didn't know it was yours… yeah, I'll replace it sometime… with my stuff.’

(1971 – ) Irish comedian, actor & writer
America Places

We have a President, perhaps for the very first time since the founding of our republic, who doesn’t appear to believe that America is the greatest earthly force for good the world has ever known.

(1964 – ) U.S. governor (Alaska) commentator & author
America Misspokements

The Holocaust was an obscene period in our nation's history. I mean in this century's history. But we all lived in this century. Well, I didn't live in this century.

(1947 – ) U.S. vice president & politician
America History Misspokements Places

In America, it's not how much an item costs, it's how much you save.

America Money Murphy’s Laws Places

Military intelligence is a contradiction in terms.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
America Intelligence Language Military Places

America: A nation that conceives many odd inventions for getting somewhere but can think of nothing to do when it gets there.

America Definitions Places

If you persecute somebody just because they might look a little different, then you are no better than our country's founding fathers.

American comedian & writer
America Characteristics Places

America is one long expectoration.

(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
America Insults Places

Kilt: A costume sometimes worn by Scotchmen in America and Americans in Scotland.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
America Clothing Definitions Places

I often confuse Americans and Canadians… by using long words.

(1973 – ) English writer & stand-up comedian
America Canada People Places

Americans detest all lies except lies spoken in public or printed lies.

(1853 – 1937) journalist, writer & editor
America Characteristics Honesty Lies People