Reviews/Criticism | Just-One-Liners.com

Subject: Reviews/Criticism (Page 5)

This film appears to be something of an homage to "Some Like it Hot", which is kind of like saying that a bum taking a crap in a dumpster is an homage to “Star Wars.”

Mr. Cranky

(movie reviews at mrcranky.com)

Reviews/Criticism “Connie and Carla”

Rock journalism is people who can’t write, interviewing people who can’t talk, in order to provide articles for people who can’t read.

Frank Zappa

(1940 – 1993) composer, guitarist, record producer & film director

Communication Reading/Writing Reviews/Criticism Rock journalism

The only conceivable reason for airing this was to bring the presenter to the greater public ridicule he so gratingly deserves.

A.A. Gill

(1954 – ) British writer & critic

Reviews/Criticism “Time to Get Your House in Order”

Shostakovich is without doubt the foremost composer of pornographic music in the history of art.

W.J. Henderson

(1855 – 1937) American musical critic & scholar

Music Reviews/Criticism On composer Dmitri Shostakovich

Battlefield Earth is like taking a bus trip with someone who has needed a bath for a long time. It's not merely bad; it's unpleasant in a hostile way.

Roger Ebert

(1942 – 2013) American film critic, journalist & screenwriter

Reviews/Criticism “Battlefield Earth”

I would accuse American Reunion of being misogynistic, but the movie seems to hold all of humanity in contempt, not just women.

Devin Faraci

film critic

Reviews/Criticism

This movie is not merely bad, but incompetent. I get tapes in the mail from 10th graders that are better made than this… I have often asked myself, “What would it look like if the characters in a movie were animatronic puppets created by aliens with an imperfect mastery of human behavior?” Now I know.

Roger Ebert

(1942 – 2013) American film critic, journalist & screenwriter

Reviews/Criticism Of “Friends & Lovers”

We could have done just as well to watch the proceedings on Court TV — free, as it were, to flip channels or get up for a snack and skip the parts that disinterest us, rather than be held hostage by 125 minutes of drive-by clichés.

Rubin Safaya

film critic

Reviews/Criticism “Find Me Guilty”

Anton Bruckner wrote the same symphony nine times, trying to get it just right… he failed.

Edward Abbey

(1927 – 1989) author, essayist & environmentalist

Music Reviews/Criticism Anton Bruckner

If you don't knit bring a good book.

Dorothy Parker

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet

Reviews/Criticism Theater

It’s truly rare that you see this level of insightful childhood psychoanalysis in a film about a basketball-playing dog.

Mr. Cranky

(movie reviews at mrcranky.com)

Reviews/Criticism “Air Bud”

There are books of which the backs and covers are by far the best parts.

Charles Dickens

(1812 – 1870) English novelist

Books Communication Reviews/Criticism

Mr. [Channing] Tatum… gives Keanu Reeves serious competition – defining numerous shades of blank of which I had been thus far unaware.

Rubin Safaya

film critic

Reviews/Criticism Reviewing “Dear John”

Modern art is what happens when painters stop looking at girls and persuade themselves that they have a better idea.

John Anthony Ciardi

(1916 – 1986) American poet, translator & etymologist

Reviews/Criticism Modern art

This time, the Force wasn’t with him.

Wallace Baine

film reviewer

Reviews/Criticism On “Star Wars: Episode I – The Phantom Menace”

… I was idly looking at the cinema ceiling, to see if there was a beam I could throw a rope over.

Peter Bradshaw

British writer & film critic

Reviews/Criticism “Raising Helen”

A totally stupid movie, Star Trek Into Darkness falls apart as it goes, raining debris as it implodes like a building being demolished.

Devin Faraci

film critic

Reviews/Criticism “Star Trek Into Darkness”

“This sucks on so many levels.” — Dialogue from Jason X. Rare for a movie to so frankly describe itself. Jason X sucks on the levels of storytelling, character development, suspense, special effects, originality, punctuation, neatness and aptness of thought.

Roger Ebert

(1942 – 2013) American film critic, journalist & screenwriter

Reviews/Criticism “Jason X”

The covers of this book are too far apart.

Ambrose Bierce

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist

Books Reviews/Criticism

Steve Guttenberg and a friendship between a dog and a dolphin – in what fiery pit of hell was this heartwarming plot conjured?

Mr. Cranky

(movie reviews at mrcranky.com)

Reviews/Criticism “Zeus and Roxanne”

Little Indian, Big City is one of the worst movies ever made. I detested every moronic minute of it…if you, under any circumstances, see Little Indian, Big City, I will never let you read one of my reviews again.

Roger Ebert

(1942 – 2013) American film critic, journalist & screenwriter

Reviews/Criticism “Little Indian Big City”

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Subject: Reviews/Criticism (Page 5)

This film appears to be something of an homage to "Some Like it Hot", which is kind of like saying that a bum taking a crap in a dumpster is an homage to “Star Wars.”

Rock journalism is people who can’t write, interviewing people who can’t talk, in order to provide articles for people who can’t read.

The only conceivable reason for airing this was to bring the presenter to the greater public ridicule he so gratingly deserves.

Shostakovich is without doubt the foremost composer of pornographic music in the history of art.

Battlefield Earth is like taking a bus trip with someone who has needed a bath for a long time. It's not merely bad; it's unpleasant in a hostile way.

I would accuse American Reunion of being misogynistic, but the movie seems to hold all of humanity in contempt, not just women.

We could have done just as well to watch the proceedings on Court TV — free, as it were, to flip channels or get up for a snack and skip the parts that disinterest us, rather than be held hostage by 125 minutes of drive-by clichés.

Anton Bruckner wrote the same symphony nine times, trying to get it just right… he failed.

If you don't knit bring a good book.

It’s truly rare that you see this level of insightful childhood psychoanalysis in a film about a basketball-playing dog.

There are books of which the backs and covers are by far the best parts.

Mr. [Channing] Tatum… gives Keanu Reeves serious competition – defining numerous shades of blank of which I had been thus far unaware.

Modern art is what happens when painters stop looking at girls and persuade themselves that they have a better idea.

This time, the Force wasn’t with him.

… I was idly looking at the cinema ceiling, to see if there was a beam I could throw a rope over.

A totally stupid movie, Star Trek Into Darkness falls apart as it goes, raining debris as it implodes like a building being demolished.

“This sucks on so many levels.” — Dialogue from Jason X. Rare for a movie to so frankly describe itself. Jason X sucks on the levels of storytelling, character development, suspense, special effects, originality, punctuation, neatness and aptness of thought.

The covers of this book are too far apart.

Steve Guttenberg and a friendship between a dog and a dolphin – in what fiery pit of hell was this heartwarming plot conjured?

Little Indian, Big City is one of the worst movies ever made. I detested every moronic minute of it…if you, under any circumstances, see Little Indian, Big City, I will never let you read one of my reviews again.