Subject: Sports » Hockey

They do a lot of talking, but I'm not sure they actually understand each other.

Canadian hockey player
Hockey Sports

Or the day I can legally start telling everyone I am sleeping with Anna Kournikova.

Russian hockey player
Hockey Sports

I'm just glad it wasn't machete night.

Canadian hockey player
Hockey Sports

I'd rather fight than score.

Canadian hockey player
Conflict Fights Hockey Sports

Three years ago, I couldn't spell author. Now I am one.

Canadian hockey player, coach & commentator
Communication Hockey Reading/Writing Sports

If you keep your opposition on their ass, they don’t score goals.

(1925 – 1990) Canadian hockey player, coach & general manager
Hockey Sports

Every day you guys look worse and worse. And today you played like tomorrow.

American hockey player & coach
Hockey Sports

Hmm, 600 games? What does it mean? It means I’m that much closer to getting fired.

Canadian hockey player & coach
Hockey Sports

People didn't know the difference between a blue line and a clothes line.

sports announcer
Hockey Sports

That puck would have gone in the net if not for the goalie.

(1958 – ) Canadian hockey player & announcer
Hockey Misspokements Sports

Some guys play hockey… Gretzky plays 40 mph chess.

American sportswriter
Hockey Sports

My wife made me a millionaire. Before she divorced me, I had three million.

professional hockey player
Divorce Hockey Marriage Misspokements Sports

If I’m half the coach on the bench that I was in the stands, we’ll have no problems.

Canadian hockey player
Hockey Sports

We are the sort of people who make health insurance popular.

Canadian hockey goaltender
Health Hockey Sports

Have another donut you fat pig!

Canadian hockey player & general manager
Hockey Sports

The only difference between the [Phoenix] Coyotes and Days of Our Lives is that nobody has been shot on our team yet.

professional hockey player
Hockey Sports

I wanted to go through the TV and strangle Terry Crisp. I wanted to punch Chris Gratton in the face. And when Petr Klima took a penalty, I wanted to send him back to Czechoslovakia.

Canadian hockey player, coach & general manager
Hockey Sports

There are certain things about my game I don't want to change, but I think it's about time that I realized I can't fight every battle. Three hundred minutes in penalties is way too many. Way too many.

Canadian hockey player
Hockey Sports

The Rangers…

Canadian professional hockey goalie
Hockey Sports

You know that creepy-looking guy you stare at two seats behind you, thinking, who would come to a movie by himself? That's me.

(1969 – ) Canadian ice hockey player & executive
Hockey People Self Sports

Ice hockey is a form of disorderly conduct in which the score is kept. 

(1926 – ) newspaper columnist
Hockey Sports